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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: ilmatar on November 23, 2014, 02:05:00 AM



Title: still contacting
Post by: ilmatar on November 23, 2014, 02:05:00 AM
Hey guys 

my 21 years old dBPDbf and I broke up again a few days ago. He left me once but I left him a few times.

he always apologize about his behavior. he neved blamed me for anything. he always says "yes, i am deserving this"

is it a standard behavior for a borderline? is he saying this for just being "good", just for forgiveness?

last night i left home without him and, i feel like i am living again for months. but i miss his smell... .

we are still talking. he left town to near his family. he said, "i was beaten by my father like everyday" but i learned that was a lie. he said "my family wont give me a chance to goin' to therapy" but i talked to his mother and she refused this.

should i stop talking to him? i still love him but after his betrayes and lies, i cant continue with him as a gf. what should i do? (sorry for my english)


Title: Re: still contacting
Post by: guy4caligirl on November 23, 2014, 07:15:57 AM
No one would ever be able to tell you what you should do .

Just yourself , now if you accept him the way he is great but there is a high price you got to pay Your insanity .

Because they cannot change , therapy might help but it's not a cure , so you have to decide and go with it .

You seem young , there are lots of guys out  there that would adore you and are for real .

I would say nipped in the butt and go on but who am I to say that you have to come to your senses and take a firm decision .

Hope that helped 


Title: Re: still contacting
Post by: fromheeltoheal on November 23, 2014, 07:59:28 AM
Your English is fine.  First, decide what you really want and need.  Then, decide if he will be able to meet those wants and needs on a consistent basis, not who you want him to be or wish he was, but who he really is.  Then act accordingly.  It's simple but it's not always easy.  Take care of you!