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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Restored2 on November 23, 2014, 03:43:18 PM



Title: NC Time Periods?
Post by: Restored2 on November 23, 2014, 03:43:18 PM
Just curious, what is the longest time period that anyone has gone with not having contact or hearing from their person with BPD after they broke up and ran away? 


Title: Re: NC Time Periods?
Post by: DangIthurts on November 23, 2014, 11:36:09 PM
I think some guy here got his ex sending him songs of love randomly after two years... .

This is a big problem for me because mine I would say is a runner... .her supply is good, I was replaced within 4 weeks and VERY cold and detached, I can't even get final responses anymore like to close out a conversation... .She even refused a happy holiday return in my final message letting her know I knew about the bf and that I wished her well... Just went silent again like after a long message about wanting her to succeed and the potential i saw in her.

Bottom line I see mine as a runner gone for good never coming back, but the guy who got love songs after two years lol who knows with any of them...


I think one distinction to be cautious of is their impulse so say in three months you got a happy miss you message, its no real indication it'll go anywhere because they could simply have that impulse act get it passed and then be back to whatever they were doing (like mine two days after officially breaking up said only I understand her with song lyrics, was attentive and kind and then poof the following week was awful treatment towards me, when I thought we'd be working it out)

Anyone (and I'm guilty of wanting to be contacted because honestly then I feel i'd have made some kind of impression I was worth talking to... .) Should be take contact with a grain of salt. And unless they're ready to be exclusive the level of freedom being single and having an emotional crutch is too great.


Title: Re: NC Time Periods?
Post by: Craydar on November 24, 2014, 05:50:38 AM
Just curious, what is the longest time period that anyone has gone with not having contact or hearing from their person with BPD after they broke up and ran away? 

I'm sure several people have left for good. In my case, I'm past 2 months now, and I'm not sure what the future holds. I'm not sure I'm emotionally ready to have any contact with her.


Title: Re: NC Time Periods?
Post by: Restored2 on November 24, 2014, 04:52:15 PM
Hi DangIthurts and Craydar.  Thank you for the comments with sharing your own experiences and caution.  Much appreciated.  I'm just trying to put it all in perspective, as it's all so very confusing and bizarre.  It sounds like one could expect the unexpected at any time... .


Title: Re: NC Time Periods?
Post by: Jessica84 on November 24, 2014, 04:58:24 PM
I think 2 weeks is the longest NC we've ever gone. Usually it's days. Never long enough to get over it.

My x breaks up when he gets a crush on some girl... .then once he's free to pursue her, he either doesn't try to or he loses interest quickly by finding faults in her, gets depressed for leaving me, slowly tries to win me over again. I shouldn't allow it, but... .I'm a fool when it comes to him. Even when I feel like an old toy replaced for a shinier object, I still care about him and hate to see him depressed. That always pulls me right back in.


Title: Re: NC Time Periods?
Post by: Restored2 on November 24, 2014, 05:52:01 PM
Hi Jessica84.  Thank you for sharing your personal experience.  I agree with what you said; "I shouldn't allow it".  I encourage you to see your own value and self-worth over his selfish needs.