BPDFamily.com

OK- I'm still wondering about what's happened and what's going to happen.

BPD/STPD is back to looking depressed again. Depressed but nasty, like an injured animal.

I've been forced by his erratic behaviour into court order. It hurts, as I'd never wanted this. 5 months ago we were planning our holiday and baby's only 10 months old, it's so sad.

But I have no choice.

What I'm wondering now is, on an emotionnal level, what might happen.

Once he ends up in his appartment, alone at last, what's going to happen?

I wonder if he will ever realize all what's he destroyed?

Will the fall be hard?

I know noone can answer this, but have you experienced similar stuff?

The disorder has many defense mechanisms that protect the ego. He copes differently than a non-disordered person. I thought he was on dating sites? How did that pan out?

Hey there :)

I have experienced similar stuff. My exBPDgf looked like crap. Everywhere weird red spots on her skin (I believe due to heavy alcohol consumtion), a bloated face, very pale. She looked like death on two legs. I think it was because of decompensation. She also had recent cuts whilst she'd told me some weeks before that she couldn't cut anymore because of her new job. I really think it hit her hard even though she was the one cutting off all contact in saying I should leave her alone. I was really sorry for her and still am sometimes. We don't even need to do anything, they make themselves miserable. Not that I ever wanted to take revenge, I never wanted. I just mean the most harm they get is from themselves and the most people they harm is themselves. Really sad story.

Nah, far as I know, I don't exist anymore. Doubt she felt much of anything.

She's looked awful ever since our split tbh.

First time I saw her she looked seriously ill.  I was also used to her spending so long on makeup and clothes etc she always looked good.

When we sat down she had greasy hair with visable dandruff, red blotchy face with Pimples and even her clothes were awful.  Oh yeah and she'd lost even more weight.

Do I feel bad of course,I do but there's nothing I can do,  she refuses to get help even though she knows she needs it. I can't kidnap her and force her to therapy

No, they emotionally attach and detach at the drop of a hat, regardless of the history with the other person.

You may think she is depressed when she's feeding you BS during a recycle attempt but chances are that isn't the case.

Yes, looking for me obviously. I hardly picture him (he's not a social person) dating people, but he might force himself... .

My ex didn't get depressed at all. Or not that I was aware of. It was just like I got thrown in the trash and someone new took may place almost immediately and into idealization phase.

No, I imagine she felt elated because she started to idolize a new guy.  I imagine that if I had walked away, and she had no backup, she would have gotten depressed.

My ex says she is heartbroken and I know her well enough to know that she might be depressed because she misses having ANYBODY next to her. But that's about it.

She's not depressed about ME, she's depressed because I left her before she could replace me.

To them, its like blowing their nose. Pull a Kleenex out, use it, throw it away, repeat... .

She most likely did. She lost weight(she was already skinny), looked like a zombie, took a lot of meds etc. Looks fine now though.

I will add that when she first started to act up I walked away and went NC for 3 weeks. When I returned she was acted anxious like she had been through hell. Though she looked good because she had once again dolled herself up like a princess for our first meeting in a month. It's amazing how they can turn on a dime when they have someone else in their life to fill the void. Three weeks later she once again looked like the unwashed masses :)

I went NC for 5 days after her last treat me special or lose me bout. When I reached out, I got dumped and had been replaced!... .lol!

Mine got really depressed towards the end of our relationship. She was always angry and sitting around. She always told me she was  miserable. I did realize at this time she had started to bring in the replacement so I assume she was depressed and angry around me... .ha  to blame someone for the unhappiness and justify the cheating in her mind.