BPDFamily.com

Hi my BPD ex girlfriend started seeing someone else straight away after we split up I'm getting reports she is abusing drugs a lot more and the type of freinds she is with now is all about chaos the same as her new bf the unemployed drug dealer type ! Just chaos chaos chaos - drama drama drama and loves it ! will to much chaos at the start of a new relationship just burn her out quickly? And she hit rock bottom?  The relationship she had with me was more family time with the kids etc then the chaos and Drama in between.

dont get me wrong i know people with BPD love chaos and drama it sort of keeps them occupied from their emptiness etc and they feel comfortable being in that environment what I'm trying to say is she has 4 children and that is reality will she burn out quickly with to much chaos and the reality of having the kids I'm just conffused why she went from a structural wanting to be a wife and mum to complete opposite over night ! Surly she can only have one or the other any ideas ? Or am I simply overlooking the fact it's all or nothing thinking black and white thinking ?

They are pretty selfish people and its a shame there are children involved with her chaos. Bpd people tend to get bored easy, maybee it was you who wanted the wife house kids family ideal and she mirrored your way and tried on your lifestyle but it wasent enough. My BPDexgf is hanging with some right sharks and seems to love the partying and choas and drama its only gonna end with them canabilising each other, its the only time they stand a chance of getting really hurt when they find people the same as themselves. When the police and courts get involved if she spins right out of control she might look inwards but i doubt it they cant take the blame or shame.

Your not far wrong it's strange she seems to go for nice guy family life to bad boy type and neglect her kids then nice guy etc the father of her first 3 kids is very similar to me the father of her 4th is bad boy unemployed type  think your right she gets board to easy and I do work long hours and we don't get to do much socialising the signs were there that she was getting board I think that's why she insisted on a break but then led to a break up with her fears of abandonment  seems to be a pattern with her she went off the rails about 4 months ago then got a call from a freind and said she was in a bad way deep depression and I got her back on the straight and narrow I think it's a case of the whole identity thing but she was never that good at talking to me like most of them she is on the verge of loosing her children and of course I got the blame ! I've been NC for 2/3 weeks now but made it clear if she needs to talk I'm here but more for the kids then hers and said im not going to pick up the pieces this Time WHEN it goes wrong she goes thru freinds like thers no tomorrow! I thought the same thing same type of people can only lead to bad times ! Especially as she is craving all the attention and they get fed up with her !