BPDFamily.com

My exBPD was of and on with being civil and cruel to me after she dumped me. We had business to take care of with the lease and exchanging belongings. One minute she would be civil, the next very cruel and seemed like she was intentionally trying to hurt me. The last thing she said to me was "Throw my things away and never contact me again".

This leaves me with doubt that I will be re-engaged, but who knows what will happen when she starts to devalue the new supply. Have any of you been contacted months down the road after being dumped to new supply and treated in a way that made it seem you would never hear from them again?

After 4 years together my loving girlfriend and the mother of my child told me she loved me more than any man alive, then the next day painted me black, she had a new dude lined up (I saw his number in her phone weeks prior) started a stupid fight dumped me and started seeing him the next day. It's been 3 months and despite me always being a great daddy and boyfriend who always put his family first she truly believes I'm most horrible person in the world  now,

Would you really want her back ?

Years, not months. I was told to lose his contact information, f off and die. About two years later, he contacted me.  So, yeah, it happens.

Yes,  in my case it didn't take long at all,  about 2 weeks?

I was called everything under the sun,  accused of all sorts of ridiculous things,  I was the worst person in the world and never wanted to see me or speak to me again.

After I obliged her request within about 2 weeks she was texting me that she didn't understand why I was ignoring her and why I hated her.

I've never had a reinitiation in a vacuum. I reinitiated, then cut off, then about 5 weeks later she contacted me

It depends on the situation... if they've essentially ended it, it would take a heck of a lot for them to seek you out. If you live close together and have the chance of being seen by him/her out in public that increases the chances of contact. But its basically all about the moon and stars and planets aligning in order for their intentions towards you to change.

You want them back in a loving relationship? fat chance! not unless there's absolutely no one else. You want to go back to how it was? That'll never happen.

Now, in the emotional sense, deep beneath the surface they did have feelings for you, but them feelings were buried beneath decades of emotional walls, trauma, abuse memories, theres never any reason to hate your ex, you should be detached and compassionate (in my opinion). Hatred and anger will eat you up and only prolong the agony. I would expect re-engagement, but do not hope for rekindling, its just not something to strive for. Unless they've entered therapy of their own volition, then you could consider it, but expect at least 2 years of turmoil in that situation.

In my experience resumed contact only resulted in further pain and suffering, its been 20+ days since contact, and I feel a heck of a lot more peace than I did whilst in contact. I don't feel any desire to communicate, who wants to hear about marriage proposals and her being lovey dovey with someone else? I don't need the gas-lighting, the almost narcissistic indifference and patronising diatribe! Who does? I felt I was being inconsiderate by denying her attempts at friendship, it was being put into a box and I did not want nor deserve that. I'm the king, she ain't my queen. This is my life, and I have just as much power and authority to box her up and keep her out of the way as she does over me.