BPDFamily.com

Last nigh I was in town and stayed with my mother and her newly wed husband. And by newly wed I mean less than a year. Last night I stayed up drank and talked to my step father. Hearing him talk gave me perspective.

You see my mother is BPD and hearing him talk helped me get over my exBPDgf who BROKE me nearly 3 months ago. The man is in living hell. He is so confused, lost, hurt, angry and in love. He has no idea what to do he has stuck by her for years yet he is getting to the point where he can't take it. I listened for hours hearing how messed up he was in the head. He has been through a lot more than I have in life and he told me in all his years he has never seen anything like it. He is going through hell. He says he loves her but he doesn't know how much longer he can live the way he is. He tells me he doesn't know if it is going to last or not, and they are going to a new marriage counselor. My mothers BPD has been flaring up the last year or two due to family issues. And my step father is suffering and on the brink of losing his mind from everything she is putting him through.

Hearing him talk has helped me a lot. pwBPD are so destructive to the mind of a person trying to help them. They are so destructive to relationships in general. I am finally seeing how my relationship would turn out if I had continued to be with my exBPDgf and it is helping me move on. And my exBPDgf was worse than my mother is. There always seem to be chaos, drama, fighting, and hell in their lives. I am finally realizing that no matter how beautiful my ex is, or how outgoing and attractive her personality was, it will end up being hell on earth in the end.

In the end, no matter how much we think we loved them,  the reality is that we would never truly be happy in these kinds of relationships. I'm glad I didn't marry my ex or get her pregnant.

Me too! that would lock me into dealing with her for life