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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: muscleheadml on December 22, 2014, 05:14:58 PM



Title: I was totally blown away ...
Post by: muscleheadml on December 22, 2014, 05:14:58 PM
I was was blown away when I found out my Girlfriend of 7 months had texted a ex Bf and told him ... ." I am afraid to breakup with him as because I am afraid he might kill himself... .When all along I thought we has a fairy tail relationship... .We are both 58 and I had not been in a relationship of any substane for a few years... .She came in my life and I had thought changed my life... .I am now moe confused and frustrated than ever... .Therapy... .reading books and learing how to "talk" to her has helped... .I am not sure if she knows she is A BPD... .(long story)... .but I am learning how not to walk on egg shells... .And waiting for next shoe to drop... .other than that she is amazing


Title: Re: I was totally blown away ...
Post by: Rapt Reader on December 22, 2014, 09:31:54 PM
Hello, muscleheadml &  *welcome*

I'm really sorry that you are having problems in your relationship with your girlfriend; there are lots of members on this site who are in similar situations as you are. You will find that you have found the right place for the support and insights you are looking for.

So, your girlfriend texted her ex about her fears of breaking up with you because she was afraid you would kill yourself? Do you think she really believes that, or was she using it as an excuse to him for her not leaving you? You say that you aren't sure if she knows that she has BPD; what makes you think that she does? Is she in any type of Therapy or anything? You mention that you are in Therapy, no?

I'm glad that you have been reading books and learning the communication tools so you can talk to your girlfriend in ways that don't push all of her buttons. If you haven't already, check out all of the links to the right-hand side of this page;  THE LESSONS have the communication tools mentioned above (Validation, S.E.T., etc.) and refresher courses never hurt 

Please tell us more about your situation, muscleheadml... .We'd like to help