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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Panther123 on December 22, 2014, 07:32:38 PM



Title: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: Panther123 on December 22, 2014, 07:32:38 PM
Wow, what a big surprise. Just got home and found house cleaned out of furniture. Bedroom set, kitchen stuff living room couches, tools, lawn mower. It's all gone

What a big shock. I feel like I should be mad but I'm not. Maybe in a state of shock. Somehow I feel a little relieved. She really is gone if she's taken all her stuff. It was hers but still leaves me with no table to feed my kids on or bed to sleep in.  Haha, at least she left the Xmas tree. Gonna have to start calling her the Grinch.

I feel like I should be mad but am just relieved and a little surprised. Guess I buy some new stuff tomorrow and move on. Fight is still on as she owns half of house and wants to take all that too. Big sigh. Can't be done soon enough.

Gonna have a drink and sleep in my kids bed. At least she didn't take that too. Kids are at their mom's thank god.


Title: Re: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: NonAverageJoe on December 22, 2014, 08:11:49 PM
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I don't think drinking is the right course of action right now.

Do what you need to do to be ok. What lead up to this? Tell us about it.


Title: Re: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: Panda39 on December 22, 2014, 09:08:24 PM
Panther123,

I did not have my house cleaned out when I separated and divorced but I did do a major purge of stuff.  I was getting rid of all my emotional baggage and a lot of stuff that had become physical baggage. 

I wanted to start fresh.

Maybe she cleaned out the house and you might miss some "things" but now your can create your own fresh start. 

Panda 

PS You might want to take pictures of the house and do an inventory of what's left before you start buying new stuff or she might try to claim that too. 


Title: Re: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: Elpis on December 23, 2014, 11:19:06 AM
Panther!

What a shock that must have been! I too am wondering what led up to this.

Take the opportunity to repaint maybe while it's empty. Especially if you're gonna need to sell the house. That's the thing I personally feel the worst about with my uBPDh--yes, my life was pretty darn difficult with him (and we were married 38 years) but I've been out of the house for the past 10 months either living with daughters or now with a friend where i'm paying a really low rent, and he resents that i'm costing him that extra money. Um, what? It's our money--I've been mostly the stay at home mom and foster care provider type, but half the house is mine. And that's where I feel awful, that i'm going to need to pursue legally separating so I can get my money out of the house, but that means he's going to have to move and I feel guilty about that... .Plus our 26 year old son lives there, and our 3 little doggies.

How many kids do you have and how old are they? And hey, at least your ex didn't ask you to help her move, right? 

So sorry you're dealing with this during the holidays... .


Title: Re: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: Indyan on December 30, 2014, 04:52:17 PM
Hi, I hope you're ok now and that you bought some nice stuff to replace what she took away.

Reading your message made me shiver, It's something I actually thought about and had my lock replaced.

BPDx claims most things are his (hard to know who paid for what in fact) and I thought he might hire a van and take things away while I'm gone.

phew, these people have no conscience.

Good your kids didn't have to witness this as this is the kind of vision they would probably remember all their lives.


Title: Re: Wow, house cleaned out
Post by: hurting300 on December 30, 2014, 06:00:50 PM
Hi, I hope you're ok now and that you bought some nice stuff to replace what she took away.

Reading your message made me shiver, It's something I actually thought about and had my lock replaced.

BPDx claims most things are his (hard to know who paid for what in fact) and I thought he might hire a van and take things away while I'm gone.

phew, these people have no conscience.

Good your kids didn't have to witness this as this is the kind of vision they would probably remember all their lives.

Remember my ex did me that way. Came home and her and the were gone. No conscience at all.