|
Title: 11 years in an a relationship with a partner with BPD traits Post by: Bpdexgirlfriend on January 04, 2015, 03:27:30 AM Hello
I'm new to posting here. I've just come out of an 11 year (on/ off) relationship with someone I believe to have traits of BPD. The realisation of his condition has only hit me the last 2 days, I always knew something wasn't right but it wasn't until Friday I accessed information about BPD and became aware of what has been happening. Is it possible to fully 'move on' and does anyone have any 'tips' on how to do so please? Thanks for reading x Title: Re: 11 years in an a relationship with a partner with BPD traits Post by: FoolishMan on January 04, 2015, 10:15:59 AM Hello I'm new to posting here. I've just come out of an 11 year (on/ off) relationship with someone I believe to have traits of BPD. The realisation of his condition has only hit me the last 2 days, I always knew something wasn't right but it wasn't until Friday I accessed information about BPD and became aware of what has been happening. Is it possible to fully 'move on' and does anyone have any 'tips' on how to do so please? Thanks for reading x My main tip would be to go NC if possible and read some of the posts on the Leaving side of the forum. There are many excellent and very helpful posters on this site as well as all the information you could ever need to decide to continue or detach. 11 years is a long time, I imagine you been through a lot. Best wishes, from someone who took 8 months to move on from an 11 month R/S lol Title: Re: 11 years in an a relationship with a partner with BPD traits Post by: ReluctantSurvivor on January 05, 2015, 10:44:49 PM Hello I'm new to posting here. I've just come out of an 11 year (on/ off) relationship with someone I believe to have traits of BPD. The realisation of his condition has only hit me the last 2 days, I always knew something wasn't right but it wasn't until Friday I accessed information about BPD and became aware of what has been happening. Is it possible to fully 'move on' and does anyone have any 'tips' on how to do so please? Thanks for reading x Welcome to the boards, I am glad you found your way to this community, It is a good place to find support in the struggles that come with dealing with BPD. I think like anything in life, you will eventually move on but you will always remember a bit of the past when dealing with new experiences. It is just a matter of feeling out what you have been through, going through those feelings and taking the time to let them out and avoid burying them. This site is a goldmine of information on moving on and healing. Beyond the information here my own experience has taught me to seek help when I feel like things are too much. That help has been the people here, a therapist, friends and family. Another thing that has helped me move on is taking all the energy I used to spend on a broken BPD r/s and learning to instead use that potential on caring for myself. I read lots of psychology, philosophy and anything regarding relationships or self growth. I treat myself better by eating healthy, giving up bad habits (smoking, negative thinking) and have found great solace in daily exercise. Find healthy things to do for yourself that make you feel good. Get help when you need it and just keep at it everyday. I was at the lowest point in my life after my relationship with a pwBPD but with time and effort I have come out stronger than ever. |iiii |