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Title: Is this his attempt to recycle? Post by: pari on January 19, 2015, 10:30:37 AM Or I am over-analyzing?
Breakup: 19 Months. NC: 14 Months Basically at one point I stopped responding to all his communication 14 months back and went NC. Havn't had any contact with him so far. 2 weeks back I saw notification on my gmail that xyz has started following you on youtube and an hour later another mail for google plus. I immediately blocked him on google (I thought I had blocked him on google already but). Today I find out that he has started following me on a photo sharing website 2 weeks back, from a different account (but similar user name). I blocked him. This doesn't scare me or make me anxious. It would be the same story - He is trying to connect so he can use me as emotional pillow while things with his gf (my replacement) ain't going well. I am only thinking about what would follow next. My guess is a phone call or text message Title: Re: Is this his attempt to recycle? Post by: Suzn on January 19, 2015, 12:34:57 PM Or I am over-analyzing? I doubt you are over-analyzing. His actions are covert. In normal or healthy situations if an ex, or you, wanted to "be friends", after a period of time after a breakup, there is DIRECT contact. Being sneaky in any way is not the sign of a mature individual, whether or not they are BPD. Title: Re: Is this his attempt to recycle? Post by: fromheeltoheal on January 19, 2015, 12:50:44 PM Think attachments with borderlines; it hurts for a borderline to let go of any attachment, regardless of all the "painted black" crap, which is just a defense mechanism. Losing an attachment is a replaying of the feelings around that earliest attachment a borderline never successfully detached from, the situation that created the disorder to begin with.
My ex still cyberstalks me and it's been years. I left her, with caused her to respect me certainly more than she showed when I was in it, and that severing of an attachment rips right to the core of the disorder. She won't contact me directly out of shame, and she's too busy with other attachments, but I'm still spending time in her head, one of the ones who got away, more valuable to her than the ones she's currently abusing. Whatever. Title: Re: Is this his attempt to recycle? Post by: ShadowIntheNight on January 19, 2015, 02:42:26 PM Or I am over-analyzing? I doubt you are over-analyzing. His actions are covert. In normal or healthy situations if an ex, or you, wanted to "be friends", after a period of time after a breakup, there is DIRECT contact. Being sneaky in any way is not the sign of a mature individual, whether or not they are BPD. Truth. Title: Re: Is this his attempt to recycle? Post by: pari on January 22, 2015, 08:12:16 AM Being sneaky in any way is not the sign of a mature individual, whether or not they are BPD. Thanks for affirmation Suzn. Sometimes I wonder now that it is over, if it really happened. But incidents are good reminder that past was real and that I survived. |