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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: vickmeister on January 19, 2015, 07:23:12 PM



Title: Constant physical ailments and deep shame
Post by: vickmeister on January 19, 2015, 07:23:12 PM
Somewhere on this site, I read two things that i can't find now. One was about how BPDs often seem to have waaaay more nagging physical complaints than would be expected, and the other was abt how they often seem to have a deep sense of shame.

Am I remembering this right?

My husband has a constant litany of illness, pains, and/or possibly serious health issues that he's constantly worrying abt.

And I have often sensed he carries guilt, depression and/or shame around with him 24/7.

Is this something anyone else deals with?


Title: Re: Constant physical ailments and deep shame
Post by: Tim300 on January 19, 2015, 08:05:51 PM
Sometimes mine would mention having some guilt or shame in the sense of feeling unlovable or mentioning how she was responsible for some previous failed relationships -- but for the most part she wasn't over-the-top with this.

As far as the physical ailments go -- yes, absolutely.  And there are definitely some entries about this already.  You might want to try searching this site for "münchausen syndrome" or headaches/migraines.  My pwBPD and her mother (also BPD) loved having physical ailments and going to the ER any chance they could get.  Also, lots of headaches for no apparent reason.       



Title: Re: Constant physical ailments and deep shame
Post by: JRT on January 19, 2015, 08:18:19 PM
mine didn't mention anything about guilt or shame but i knew it was there... .ate least after the fact.

as far as physical ailments, she had a ton of them, real and perceived and psychosomatic... .she had a serious car accident that sent her to surgery with a plate in her spine... .then there is the thyroid problem... .some skin problem ... .a hair loss issue... .cysts... .large ingrown pimples on her face that came from no where... .sleep issues... .the list went on