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Title: Mixed emotions Post by: WhoMe51 on January 22, 2015, 08:20:55 PM I woke up this morning so angry. I'm angry at myself and her. I became a doormat for her. I changed for her trying to make it work. She would get mad at me for something small and then she would rage at me for days. So I would do everything I could not to set her off. I would then watch what I did or said after that. One time I said something that she said that I shouldn't say. I was so nervous. I was filled with anxiety about the situation that I couldn't enjoy myself with her later. I became a walking shell of a man. For what? Why didn't I just walk away before I became this way? She always gave me a little hope that things would get better. It was like I would forget about the abuse that she put me through when she gave me hope. I so wanted to believe that things were going to get better. And that I had actually done something right. This is the reason I kept going back. I thought she had finally understood that I loved her and things were going to get better. She always gave me a little hope. And she knew that was all it would take. She knew I wouldn't go anywhere. I guess I am just venting.
Title: Re: Mixed emotions Post by: Mutt on January 23, 2015, 03:59:07 PM Hi WhoMe51,
It's not fun waking up in the morning angry. I can relate after the break-up not feeling well when I woke up. Not fun. It's understandable the anger directed at her and the pain. I think you're being hard on yourself. Don't beat yourself up. |