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What was your expwBPD like as a teenager through young adulthood? I hear that it is difficult to diagnose BPD when the person is under 18, but I am sure they showed strong signs throughout their teen years. I know mine did

As a teenager, my exBPDbf didn't want to be at home, so he bounced around from friends' houses, got kicked out of high school, fought a lot, listened to music and cut the holy hell out of himself. In his 20s, he turned to lots of cocaine, drinking, more fighting, more cutting, unstable employment, and highly explosive relationships. Then he started therapy, changed his name, and cleaned up his act in a lot of ways.

I have no idea as she rarely talked about it.  I met in when she was 37 years old.  From what her mom has mentioned, she's always been feisty.  I don't think she really was involved in too much promiscuous behavior until after her first divorce.  She was divorced by 22 or 23.  She is very beautiful and got involved in modeling and think that is when her lifestyle changed I think.

She won't talk about it much.  Think she got abused while in that industry.  Before me, I think she went through a pretty long streak of men.  Had a couple abortions and said if I ever got her pregnant she would have another.  But never wanted to use birth control.  She will drink on rare occasions and I think smoked a little but would throw a fit if I had a drink every now and again.

But she deregulated daily.  Yelling and screaming at me and her kids.  No doubt in my mind she is BPD.  After this last devaluation she wants absolutely nothing to do with me.  Even threatened harassment charges if I even text her again.

This is a woman that had just pressured me to buy an engagement ring just weeks before.  And I bought it.

Im sorry to hear about that sudden devaluation, especially after getting an engagement ring. I am just curious about their past sounds like she got married young and was really impulsive.

In high school, she had two steady boyfriends, later admitted to cheating on one.  After high school, she spent a year or more heavily abusing MDMA and LSD.  She took those drugs everyday, at higher and higher doses, until they no longer worked and she fried her brain.  Those drugs aren't the type you can function on.  Some folks can smoke pot every evening and you'd never know it.  You can't use those drugs everyday and be even semi-normal.  She then was a drunk for a while, was a functional drunk when I met her.  Her relationship history was very murky, but I know she cheated on her two longest time boyfriends, and my bet is that she slept around a lot (just everything fit together to scream "easy".  That's all I really know.  She only told me things that would elicit sympathy, explain her problems, or make her seem interesting/little wild.  I'm sure at least 75% of what I was told were lies or partial truths. 

Mind you my knowledge is mainly based off her stories (some corroborated by family or friends), so you can probably take most of it with a grain of salt.

Age 15 to 18:

-Extremely emotionally unstable; poor relationship with mom (admits this herself, confirmed by her mother & sister)

-Partied & drank regularly (friends would go to her house for sleep overs, cause mom would let them hop a cab to the club while they were still under 18).

-Poor student (finished 2nd to last in her class of 50 students one semester)

-One long-term BF throughout (7 year relationship; claimed he was verbally/emotionally abusive)

Age 18 to 21:

-Still unstable, but supposedly calmer than HS years (again her statement)

-Partying/drinking slightly decrease (scary thought when someone parties less in college than they did at 15)

-Regular Pot use (stopped cold turkey after a bad trip related to smoking something that had been laced)

-Improved slightly academically, but still poor grades

-Handful of short-term BFs or love interests (plus one female friend that she was apparently regularly amorous with while stoned)