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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: emancipated on January 28, 2015, 05:22:50 AM



Title: consider the camels back broken
Post by: emancipated on January 28, 2015, 05:22:50 AM
I'm not normal nor do I claim to be. In my quest for getting my questions answered I've down some shady dishonest things... And last night was one of those nights... I found out that my ex had not only given the dog we adopted together away but had actually at the encouraging of the replacement abandoned her in the country. I was devastated reading this especially after no call and lied when I asked about the dog. Everything else I learned seems to pale in comparison... Learned when and how they met and apparently they are having an active sex life because of all the emails pertaining to it. The woman I knew never would have abandoned an Animal much less a dog . I can honestly say that this is good because with finality and certainty that door is nailed shut... I contacted the local humane society to see If they could help me... pleas pray for my Lola bear


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: Arminius on January 28, 2015, 05:33:11 AM
I have some empathy.

We had three dogs, she took the youngest. I also let her take the vehicle I owned that was adapted for dog transportation. I let her take the vehicle at 50% value.

She tried to sell the vehicle to a friend of mine at 200% value ( they don't think right) almost immediately, and I heard on the grapevine that she gave the dog away within days.

I didn't want the dog, it's true to say, but I had people who would have taken her, rather than have her given away.

It was an expensive dog, imported from Europe and breeders wanted her. Now she's in some god knows what home... .I know she didn't ebd up anywhere useful as I still have the appears, without which she has no value.

The person I thought she was would never have done that.

But, here I am over a year on.

I've dated extensively, reaffirmed , if you will, that I'm a nice man. I've met numerous people who I've preferred to her, people more whole, more normal.

And, I'm now dating someone amazing, truly amazing.


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: raisins3142 on January 28, 2015, 12:56:06 PM
I'm so sorry.

If my ex ever hurt my dog, then I would be in jail right now.  'Nuff said.

My uBPDexgf didn't like dogs too much, and never warmed up to mine.

If we lived together, and she got jealous or tired of the dog, I could see her in the future leaving the door open "accidentally" to let him out.  Why can I imagine this?  Because I never saw her acting nurturing to anything at all.  She actually told me that she did not avoid animals much if they were in the road.  It is actually scary reflecting back on how cold her heart likely could be.  I was used for "supply".


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: raisins3142 on January 28, 2015, 01:14:15 PM
I would threaten her with criminal prosecution to find out exactly where it was dropped and then go look for the dog and contact people nearby.  Then ya know what I'd do?  Get her prosecuted for cruelty to animals even if she helps and seems sorry.

This just makes my blood boil... .I'm so angry right now for you and Lola.


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: Perdita on January 28, 2015, 03:04:08 PM
That's just cold!  Hope you find your Lola soon, safe and sound. 


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: emancipated on January 28, 2015, 11:12:47 PM
Thank u for ur kind responses and I got some good And bad news ... the bad news is my ex did indeed abandon her Ina rough neighborhood of town... she was rescued safely and has a new family that loves her. I still want my dog back but I blame myself for having to leave her with my ex to begin with. I didn't think this was possible the people at the humane society contacted her new family on my behalf to check on her and to note the account And let them know if for any reason they can't keep her I would gladly drive back to town to get her... and in an odd turn of events I not only found my anger towards my ex that I could never develop before but was in my opinion finally able to not only close the door and lock it where I don't fear running into her or her trying to get me back because she did something I just can't forgive. Thank u again for the kind words I cried a lot today thinking about what happened and for what she might have been thinking going from a new home to the streets but in a way it also convinced me that my ex is BPD the ability to do that to a innocent dog and to not even call.me to give me the chance to come and get her and then lie later saying they still had the dog the other developments I expected at least somewhat and if this one didn't end like all other relationships for her she is doing a great job of saying the same song and dance that I fell for... I hope to get Lola back someday but also just relieved she has a good family the last thing I can say about all this is I fear what she may be capable of should she decide to try and get me back if she is willing to do this I can honestly not afraid but finally free


Title: Re: consider the camels back broken
Post by: raisins3142 on January 28, 2015, 11:53:26 PM
I'm so glad Lola is safe, but it is bitter sweet.

How upset you got just proves your good heart in relation to that of your ex.  Someone like you could never hurt an innocent dog that they did not even know, let alone a dog you knew, and would go out of your way to save a poor creature.

Agreed that this shows you what type of person she is.  Imagine having kids with her.  When you are feeling blue, just remember that you escaped from a dangerous and toxic relationship.