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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: Terrychango on February 06, 2015, 04:58:11 PM



Title: Will therapy bring her back?
Post by: Terrychango on February 06, 2015, 04:58:11 PM
What are people's experience of people from BPD going through therapy? Does it help them, is she more likely to be able to be normal with me? ( normal is a bad word I know)

My expwBPD has just started group cbt and has been seeing a therapist for 3 months, what impact will it have on how she treats r/s?


Title: Re: Will therapy bring her back?
Post by: Tim300 on February 06, 2015, 05:16:53 PM
My BPDex-fiancee was going to therapy weekly (I don't know if any of it was specialized for BPD) and she also had a DBT workbook.  We did a couple exercises together with the workbook.  This workbook wasn't revealed to me until the final month or so of the relationship, so I don't know if this was a new development or if she had done some form of DBT for years.  Anyhow, long story short, within a month or two of living together, our 2.5-year relationship and 10+ year friendship completely crashed down like the worst of the BPD stories you have read on here.  I now anticipate lifelong NC.  So it seems like the therapy and DBT was not a match for her intense BPD undercurrent.

Also, we went to a MC towards the end and this seemed to trigger dysregulation (i.e., make things worse) because the MC must have brought up some sensitive issues and also because the MC seemed to lean towards my side of things.

I hope things work out more smoothly for you.   


Title: Re: Will therapy bring her back?
Post by: EaglesJuju on February 06, 2015, 05:40:44 PM
My bf is currently going through therapy. He is doing rather well. He is getting better at controlling his emotions, working on coping mechanisms, and communication.  

The impact of therapy is reliant on an individualized basis and how severe certain traits are. Due to BPD being a spectrum disorder there is variance with the severity of certain traits.  Also, the relationship amongst the therapist and the patient is important. If a good amount of trust is established, it makes the process a little more efficient.  


Title: Re: Will therapy bring her back?
Post by: mrwigand on February 06, 2015, 10:05:51 PM
My ex-girlfriend was diagnosed BPD and started BPD centered therapy at the tail end of our relationship, and I believe that she's getting healthier. I can't speak with authority, but I've read and researched and from what I've learned therapy can be very successful if the person is fully invested. Also, apparently people with BPD who successfully recover have a much lower frequency of relapse than people who suffer from other things like depression.

There are some very interesting podcasts on iTunes on BPD therapy if you look up borderline personality disorder. Consider giving them a listen!