BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: oojamaflump on February 07, 2015, 06:28:12 PM



Title: Just saying "hey"... and giving you the general run-down...
Post by: oojamaflump on February 07, 2015, 06:28:12 PM
My girlfriend of 9 months has been given a tentative diagnosis of EUPD by 3 Mental Health nurses.  She fits all 9 of the criteria, and is just waiting for her psychiatrist to assess her.

I've known she has EUPD since the first month I've been with her.  I have supported her through the potential diagnosis, whereby she has felt shocked and alarmed - I have tried to help her see that rather than being diagnosed by her G.P as depressive, self-harming, EDNOS, anxiety-disordered, suicidally ideated, impulsive, drug dependent, antisocial, etc, etc- that she has just one condition, and that all these issues are small parts of that.  She is not always depressed, she does not always need to binge/purge/both, etc.  That it is one condition that can be treated.

She has mostly accepted this - except for when it gets thrown in my face:  I should not be upset when she spends 2 hours at 3am calling me lazy, evil , uncaring, selfish b___.

To put this all in perspective  - I have severe depression.  We are a match made in hell.  Except that when we are happy and content, we enjoy (because we always love) each other so much, so deeply.  No-one understands us the way we do each other.  She is perfect and I could not be without her and I know she feels the same way.  but it means there are times that I need some looking after.  And her condition is seriously hard work.

So, I'm here to share thoughts and to gain insight, to support others but to gain some strength myself.

I'm really looking forward to meeting you all!

Lx


Title: Re: Just saying "hey"... and giving you the general run-down...
Post by: felix22 on February 08, 2015, 10:44:49 PM
Hello and Welcome,

I am not on here that much. Am just back here today for the first time in a few weeks, as I have stuff on my mind. Sounds intense-your gal. You seem pretty clear about loving her though. So, I guess for you maybe it's a matter of finding tools for dealing with the fall-out. I'm sure there are many folks with hundreds of posts that will have lots of good things to say. I learn a lot just by reading other's posts. It's amazing how clear other's problems seem to be. Then, in contrast, our own are such fogs.

Well, anyhow, best of luck!

~Fl