BPDFamily.com

Hi. I am so happy to have found this forum. My boyfriend was just diagnosed a few months ago and I've been researching everything I can... but it's lovely to hear from other partners and family of those with BPD. Really realllly needed this. I have so many questions, some small, some overwhelming and terrifying.

I'll start with a light one- Does anyone else's BPD partner suffer CONSTANTLY from all sorts of physical ailments/aches/pains?

While my boyfriend has gone through very real and painful health problems earlier in his life... currently it's the little things that leave him moaning. Every day. EVERY DAY. Head, shoulders, back, knees, feet. Is this common? Then, while he's apparently suffering from chronic pain like this, he begs to be beaten (totally separate sex-related subject), but the paradox just confounds me.

Kinda the opposite with my gf.

She just internalizes and downplays any pain or injury. Will only take meds as a last resort. Can sometimes see she is hurting, but she just brushes it off if I mention anything.

mine is in constant pain w multiple med probs. how much of it is real and how much is caused by his internal hatred for himself i don't know. i do know that i had to go thru his pills and returned about 3-5lbs of expired meds to the pharmacy. i would guess he takes about 60 or so meds/pills of different kinds a day. that no doubt adds to his troubled mind. mixing meds without knowing the side effects can play havoc on the mind of sane people, not to say what it does to those with BPD.

It is very common. In our case there is usually several complaints a day. something to do with an endless search for sympathy. They need something tangible, rather than the intangible psychological issues that are causing it, in order to get it. So yes the pain is real but it is not what they are assigning it to.

Then a real issue comes along and you don't believe it.