BPDFamily.com

does any deal with cheating with their BPD?

my uBPDh has cheated on me numerous times in the past (I didn't find out about most of them until after we were married).  I didn't think he would cheat again after everything we've been through, but it happened again (found pictures of him kissing a co-worker).

He has extremely inappropriate boundaries with women and doesn't understand it.  Yet belittles me for being "too friendly"

anyone else deal with a serial cheater? or did I just get stuck with a BPD who's a complete assh*le?

There's another active thread here that talks about cheating. It got me thinking last night, and after reading your post, I want to try putting it into words. My pwBPD won't/doesn't cheat, but I've been thrown into a lot of incidents where others do... .or make aggressive attempts to.

While I can confidently say that it's a d---ish move to cheat on an SO, I don't want to throw out opinions about anything else until I have a more coherent pile of words.

My girlfriend has cheated on the last two boyfriends she's had,  and cheated on her last boyfriend with me.

I don't know much about the first time but I do know that when she cheated with me it was a gradual build up to it happening after several weeks of problems in her relationship. 

I have told her if she does it to me that I'll be leaving and I'll never return and it's a boundary I'd have no problems sticking to.  I'll never stand for it.

I think if you are with a pwBPD it's something that has to be considered,  but in my case I don't feel too worried it would happen as if our relationship started getting that bad that she was out hanging with "guy friends" I'd have ended things at that stage.

She knows I'm serious too so I doubt she'd do it unless she was done too

would you please share the link or navigate to the thread? I'm having hard time processing he might have cheated on me, a wife. I have all reasons to believe he did. Given the extent of trust I had in him, and how much love and care I've invested into him, I am really-really hurting.

My first husband chronically cheated on me with anyone and everyone he could: friends, acquaintances, prostitutes. He was very good at keeping it secret too. It was extremely painful when I started to connect the dots. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.    It's a complete deal-breaker for me.

I was cheated on throughout our 10-year marriage. In fact, he cheated on me when we were still dating and I just found out about it last year. I also just found out he cheated on me when I was pregnant too. Yet he expected me to be innocent and untouched by any other male and he was extremely possessive and controlling even when we separated every time and even after our divorce that took place over a year ago. Even after that he expected me to be faitful and he did not see his indiscretions as anything morally worng. He even tried to blame it on me.

I see his cheating as a big  part of his disorder, something I was not willing to live with for the rest of my life.

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=272910.0