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I don't know what to do here. She says she's not... ..but she always lies about being drunk. I hate using the word always, but in this case it is true. Every time.

It is hard to be patient. She accuses me of not trusting her. She hides the bottles, so I can't "prove" anything, and I'm a "bad person" for judging her for acting like a human being. I told her that I am concerned about her, and that I can tell she is upset that I don't trust her. I also told her I need her to show me that she can be honest about when she does drink for me to learn to trust her.

It didn't go well. She gets angry and calls herself a nobody, and it is hard not to feel guilty. The way she says it, I feel like I'm the one called her a nobody and kicked her around.

I'm doing my best to keep an even keel and not get sucked in to the emotional spiral, but at the same time support her and help her be healthy.

Maybe I'm wrong this time... .maybe she's not drunk. I hope that I am wrong. She is picking me up from work, so I will see which one of us is driving home.

God... .I've been there. I am so sorry  My H has picked me up from work drunk a few times, and I could tell before he got to my work by the way he was texting me. I had to put a boundary into place about it, and it sounds like that's what you are struggling with.

Is she in treatment our counseling about her drinking?

 

Instead of "helping your partner be healthy... ."

Focus on making healthy choices and setting healthy boundaries for yourself first.

Update... .she wasn't drunk. She's pregnant.  

Dude!  Do you already have any kids?

Is drinking a problem historically with her?

How do you feel about the pregnancy/