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My exBPD obviously will face ridicule from her mother and brother if she breaks N/C and gets in touch or does something unexpected like trying to get me back.

In the event that she felt strongly enuff to want to contact or somehow return, would the Bull/S that she would get from the family stop her?  Or would the BPD over ride any control that others would be trying to force upon her with manipulation or other tactics?

I know that if I felt compelled to do something... .there isn't a force in the universe (except God) that could hold me back.  I would travel the earth from edge to edge or do just about anything.  Do you think she would do the same or what.

Are you feeling compelled to save her from her mother and her brother DL?

Let's say she did attempt contact... .what has changed in the time you've been apart?

No Suzn, I don't want to save her... .but if she wanted to contact me, I'd want to know that she would actually do it regardless of who or what tried to stop her.  I know it's crazy, but it's what I'm going thru right now. Until I can throw her by the wayside without regrets.   Thinking back on what I just wrote, I wanna delete everything... .but then I'm not facing my feelings... .right?

Right. That's very perceptive of you DL.

I've felt as you do before too, that someone else was to blame for my exBPDgf's past actions. I struggled with integrating the good and the bad into the whole person she was. It's hard to remember how we struggled under the same roof, all I wanted to hold onto was the good times. There were times I thought "if she would only stop hanging out with that crowd of friends or this crowd, or stop drinking, things would be ok." I was in denial of plenty that went on when no one was around but the two of us.

I lied to myself because I didn't want to go through the pain of a breakup without the person who had on many occasions gave me comfort. It got better over time, when I started learning how to comfort myself. 

Wow needed this today thanks.