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Title: What I actually heard was, "I don't love you" (mom) Post by: Lifewriter16 on May 08, 2015, 07:00:04 AM I remember, one night, when I was a child, perhaps aged 10 or 11, my Mum sat on my bed and said: "God loves you".
I can not remember why she decided to say that. I can only assume that I was upset about something. It may have been about my grandfather dying. What I actually heard was, "I don't love you". It was only when I was an adult and had done enough personal development work to be able to tell her that I loved her, that she was able to tell me that she loved me too. I have carried a feeling that my mother didn't love me around all my life. And it hurts and makes me feel sad. I'm supposed to pose a question, aren't I? Quite frankly, I don't know what to ask, I'm just grateful to have to opportunity to share this with you and have you witness it. Thank you for doing that. Lifewriter Title: Re: What I actually heard was, "I don't love you" (mom) Post by: misuniadziubek on May 09, 2015, 09:33:49 AM I'm glad you eventually hit a high point where you could tell her you loved her.
God loves you is pretty invalidating in a conversation that isn't about God but rather trying to comfort someone. Kind of like, you shouldn't feel sad, not because I'm here, your mother, but because a magical man in the sky cares about you. Except that she was kind of telling you that she loved you indirectly. Kind of like saying, you are worthy of love and you aren't alone. Except that kids don't listen to parents in anticipation of a deep metaphor that they have to analyse. They hear what is being said and up to a certain age accept it without judgment. |