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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Bassoutcast on May 14, 2015, 07:05:06 AM



Title: Wrote a few poems about my situation...
Post by: Bassoutcast on May 14, 2015, 07:05:06 AM
Hey guys.

Yesterday I was feeling down, my heart was aching (physically), pumping fast, I recited the b/u, saying things I could have said differently, literally choking up with tears... .it's been 2 months... .

I love writing so I took it out on paper, thought I'd share it with you guys.

This one's from yesterday, I call it "Ode to a sacrifice"

I remember when I met you, crazy eyes looking at me

You were broken, left, abandoned - and triggered my sympathy

We became the best of friend, talking hours, day or night

Couldn't see past the reflection of your mirror shining bright

Dragged my ship into the water, to the eye of the storm

What other may deem irrational - to us it was the norm

And the sight of open cuts when you tried to take your life

Haunted me with countless nightmares, yet I made a sacrifice

You became my drug of choice, my addiction, my desire

Like a moth I flew to you, and got burned by the fire

Poured my heart into a well, in return you gave me water

To survive, an empty shell, in the chaos that your order

All the words I saranaded were now viewed in distortion

What we had was never born, you only prolonged the abortion

As the cracks grew large in number, the illusion faded fast

And a bond I took as godsent in the ground was layed to rest


And I found this one today, this one contained more "raw emotions", since it's been written I think in the week after the b/u.

It was like a fairy tale,

A romantic story written so well

Into open water, together, you and I fell

I was charmed, hooked under a spell

Isolated from a world I considered hell

Couldn't believe something so good existed for me

And I opened up my heart. and I lowered down my guard

But reality hit me, and hit me hard

I fell from the clouds and got torn apart

You were my everything, thought I was yours too

Turns out under the surface it wasn't true

Why did you disappear? where's the girl that I knew?

A disorder that twists and bends the mind

Only time will tell, in the end I'll find

But know this - I am yours, and you can still be mine

I will love you forever, throughout the pain

I will love you forever, even if in vain

I love you and hope that you'll feel the same

Hope you guys enjoy it... .let me know what you think. I'm sure some can relate to it... .just thought it'd be nice to share.

And sorry if there are any misspells, I'm not a native English speaker.


Title: Re: Wrote a few poems about my situation...
Post by: Achaya on May 14, 2015, 10:02:50 AM
These are very impressive pieces, all the more if English is not your native language. The second poem especially captures what I felt shortly after the breakup. You are very talented!


Title: Re: Wrote a few poems about my situation...
Post by: Lifewriter16 on May 14, 2015, 10:08:40 AM
Hi Bassoutcast,

I LOVE these and how exciting to have a bit of poetry. I can barely believe you are not a native English speaker.

Here's a poem I wrote about a man I dated before my BPDxbf. Now I know about BPD, I'd hazard a guess that he has BPD too:

An innocent naivety prevails

As I suddenly come alive.

His languid eyes take me captive and

I am swathed in the cocoon I always craved.

So enticing, so enthralling is he that

I must be with him to even be.

There, I feel so much myself, that

A deluge of desire sweeps over me.

I hear the tremor of danger in his voice.

I hear, but I do not want to perceive

That the very thing I craved could ruin me.

As he gently spins his web of love,

I succumb.

Choosing doubt over despair,

I descend deeper and deeper into confusion.

I linger to relish life.

As the cocoon is spun, I gasp.

The more I struggle, the more entwined I become.

Though I have the will to break free,

I savour my captivity.

Am I to be denied my blessed release,

Unless a hungry bird plucks me out?

A saviour who devours me

And thus puts me out of my misery.



As you can probably tell, I was pretty much in a similar mess with him as my BPDxbf... .Well, you live and learn (as they say) and thankfully, I am learning... .

Lifewriter


Title: Re: Wrote a few poems about my situation...
Post by: Bassoutcast on May 14, 2015, 10:38:46 AM
Lifewriter - Great piece, I enjoyed it :) Thought it'd be nice for a change for people to share some of their pain in an artistic form, hence this thread.

Achaya - Thanks! I've been writing ever since elementary school, and as the years passed a larger portion of my writing was in English (mainly because it's a worldwide language and more people can relate). I hope one day to overcome my laziness and actually finish writing a book.

Keep posting guys, I'd love to see more!