BPDFamily.com

Hi. My mom had BPD. She recently attempted suicide. She is staying at my house and we just got into an argument. I have no idea how to difuse the situation so we can move on peacefully from here.

Hi Ellieparade

I can imagine how difficult it can be having your mother stay at your house. I am very sorry to hear she recently attempted suicide. How is she doing now? Since she's staying at your house you might benefit from some information we have here about creating a crisis safety plan for when a family-member has BPD: Crisis Safety Plan: When a family member has Borderline Personality Disorder (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=272865.0)

You say you just got into an argument with your mother. What is it about? We have several communication techniques on this site that are helpful when dealing with someone with BPD. I've listed two of them:

Communication Skills - Validation (https://bpdfamily.com/content/communication-skills-validation)

A 3 Minute Lesson on Ending Conflict (https://bpdfamily.com/content/ending-conflict)

The second link above goes to information about things you might do yourself to try and end the cycle of conflict.

Take care

Try not to let her push your buttons and good for you for writing here.  When she starts with you stay mindful you will report in to this or a new thread and will have a cushion and a base camp for dealing with this challenge.

Breathe.  Especially exhale fully so you can fully inhale.

Also, say the serenity prayer to yourself. That often helps me.  God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Also, remember the 3 C's, I didn't cause it, I can't control it, I can't cure it (iirc).