BPDFamily.com

Dear Darling Ex's in our lives,

Please lower your guard, open your mind and read on.

Please understand that most of us Love you. Still, and some of us will NEVER get over you no matter how hard we try.  This is not a competition to see who could hold on the longest. This is not a hate spree. This is real life and you have become imprinted in our minds, our hearts, our souls, our pasts, our presents as well as our futures.

You are not completely to blame and neither are we. Sometimes you are and sometimes we are. Sometimes our relationships would never have ended had it not been for your actions. It might have been "OUR" actions that ended it ultimately, and because a relationship relies on more than one person, yes we were part of it.

We know that you may not be able to absorb this, but just for a second we want you to become "US" and feel and know what we feel.  We want you to know just how much of our hearts have leaked into your hearts.  We want you to try to feel our pains even though you suffer from your own daily. We wish you could think like us also just for a short time. So that you know that we hurt too.  As mean and cruel as you might have thought we are or were, we were not always like this to you and we need you to think back.  To the smiles, the hugs, the kisses, the Love.

We don't understand how you feel either, we wish we could be in your shoes for that short period also. So that we could cry and yell and scream just like you do, whether it be on the inside or outside.  We choose you for reasons. You choose us for reasons.  It's just not fair that you've left our lives to the tune of playing by your rules, while you've had no regards for our rules.  We try. We've tried. We've cried and have been tormented while you have been.  We still cry and hurt beyond belief. Of course there are the children and the families that are suffering right now too.

We've gathered here to cope. We find comfort in sharing our feelings and lives with other people that quite frankly cannot hold it together day to day.  We overcome. We fake it. We attempt to move on with all our pain.  We suffer minute to minute day to day and on.  We miss you, our lives, our families, we miss the portion of our lives we devoted to you and everything that we believed in about you.  We are not perfect. You are not perfect. The lack of perfection and acceptance between the two of us is what made life so special with you.  Not all of us would want to relive what once was, but I'm sure that I would want to if I knew there was a snowballs chance in the sun.

This place is not a place of hate, it's a place of feeling, love and recovery for our hurting hearts and souls.  If it were up to me alone, I would cry just one last time as I took you back into my life under different circumstances. Bad things happen to good people you know. We are both good people, or at least we were and could be again.

Sincerely,

Your Broken Hearted Loves

Very nice comforting letter DL. Hope ur doing well this weekend. We're coming up on the Big 80!

Hang tough!

Thanks dagwoodb.  I'm heading in the right direction.  I've made a decision to get out of the past and beginning living again.  I hurt and I'm tired of hurting.  Thank you.  AND I'm moving to forgiveness across the board.  The anger (hate) is making me the person that I don't like.  Sending you a PM, check your inbox.

DL, just curious, do you think that your ex is reading the boards? I have heard that from two other people presently on the boards. Thanks.

Apollotech, I don't know for sure.  It's possible.  My letter goes out to any of them though. We are all related and They need to know how we feel and what has happened in everyones life because of BPD.  Can't hurt to inform them in this way.