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Title: how to validate this Post by: Holding On on May 27, 2015, 07:37:51 AM how do you validate someone when they are accusing you of cheating.they don't accuse of anything specific just that they have the feeling. it is categorically untrue and I've not displayed any behaviors that would be considered suspicious.
Title: Re: how to validate this Post by: Wrongturn1 on May 27, 2015, 08:48:23 AM I get this one sometimes from my uBPDw. It usually does not matter much what I say b/c she is dysregulating at that point. You might try SET:
S: "You are so important to me and I really care about how you are feeling"; E: "It must be awful to feel like your significant other/spouse would be unfaithful to you - my heart goes out to you"; T: "At the same time [don't say "but"], I have never cheated on you and I will never do that. Please know that my commitment to you is rock solid". Or something along these lines. Keep us posted on how things are going! Title: Re: how to validate this Post by: Holding On on May 27, 2015, 01:47:25 PM Thank you that is helpful. To me. I'm not sure he didn't throw it back into my face bit we will see.
Title: Re: how to validate this Post by: waverider on May 28, 2015, 03:09:21 AM Then disengage dont keep having the same defensive discussion. If he simply will not leave it alone then it's boundary time.
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