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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Daisy67 on May 31, 2015, 03:25:30 AM



Title: 65 year old mother
Post by: Daisy67 on May 31, 2015, 03:25:30 AM
Can anyone relate. My 65 year old mother who from reading here has been BPD most of my life, has given up on life.  She will not leave her house, addicted to prescription drugs, watches TV all day, has no interest in her grandchildren.  She also suffers from depression. We all run about after her doing her shopping, taking care of things. She won't cook or clean either, she's been like this for about 7 years now and no amount of intervention either through social work or medical makes any difference. We've given up trying to change her.


Title: Re: 65 year old mother
Post by: DreamerGirl on May 31, 2015, 03:40:12 AM
Hi Daisy,

Yes I relate.  Totally.  My mother is a similar age, BPD and a hypochondriac waif these days, wanting her daughters to look after her.  We can never do enough.  She sent an email last week to my sisters and I saying, I was the best mother I knew how to be, I don't know why you all treat me this way.  I'm sorry I wasn't perfect, or words to that effect. 

It's hard work, that I understand.  My mother has no life, apart from us girls, so that is a lot of pressure on us to keep her happy.  My mother is an alcoholic, has major depression as well and also takes prescription drugs.

Sadly the grandkids of my mothers' have never known her to be the type of grandma that is there for them.  She will often pit them against each other, like she did with my sisters and I, and still does.  One is white the others are black, but this changes constantly, depending on who is there for her... .

Big hugs its sure hard... .



Title: Re: 65 year old mother
Post by: enlighten me on May 31, 2015, 03:54:22 AM
Just a thought and I may be well off target but is what your doing enabling her behaviour?

By having you all run around after her she has put herself above all others and has become the centre of attention.  This is a place where pwBPD want to be. Having people show them they are loved and special.