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Title: Learning Validation Post by: Cole on June 26, 2015, 05:29:57 PM We all talk about validation on this site. And I don't know about the rest of you folks, but I struggle with it. Not only is it a difficult to master skill for the type A's, but it is even harder to master at the level needed to be in a relationship with a pwBPD.
So. I have been researching the topic and came across several great sources. This is the best I have seen, and thought I would share: www.santacruztherapist.net/Articles/Validating%20Feelings.html Sure would favor some feedback from those who are better than I with this skill. Title: Re: Learning Validation Post by: jhkbuzz on June 26, 2015, 05:44:26 PM I'm not responding because I'm better at it; I'm responding because I've always been a bit confused by it myself. That article is clear and easy to understand! |iiii
Title: Re: Learning Validation Post by: Cole on June 26, 2015, 06:22:55 PM I'm not responding because I'm better at it; I'm responding because I've always been a bit confused by it myself. That article is clear and easy to understand! |iiii It is an eye opener. I am a problem solver, very logical and unemotional. Comes from years in law enforcement. W voices how she feels, I automatically try to solve the problem. This does not work out too well. BPDw, like most pwBPD, is HIGHLY emotional. Makes communication extremely difficult. Title: Re: Learning Validation Post by: jhkbuzz on June 26, 2015, 08:21:33 PM I'm not responding because I'm better at it; I'm responding because I've always been a bit confused by it myself. That article is clear and easy to understand! |iiii It is an eye opener. I am a problem solver, very logical and unemotional. Comes from years in law enforcement. W voices how she feels, I automatically try to solve the problem. This does not work out too well. BPDw, like most pwBPD, is HIGHLY emotional. Makes communication extremely difficult. Yes - I wish I had understood this (and validation) when I was in the r/s. We parted ways nearly a year ago. Good for you for trying to understand and implement good communication skills! |