|
Title: dBPDsis' birthday on 8/13 - Any Advice for how to deal? Post by: Meadowslark on August 10, 2015, 01:15:01 PM Hey guys, I'm looking for some tips/tricks on how to distract myself during BPDsis' birthday on the 13th. This will be the first birthday where I haven't sent her anything, done anything for her or made her a card (it's more thoughtful that way, I think). I've been on a very strict NC with her since January.
That being said, she still occasionally talks to Mom and/or Dad, and only when she wants something. My sister doesn't say "hi" for the sake of it, doesn't ask how you're doing. There's an ulterior motive. Mom told me today that she sent BPDsis a birthday card only to stave off any potential explosions. Mom loves her, but hates who my sister has become (in terms of her abusive behavior). BPDsis claims to be transgender, but doesn't make any progress towards even slight transition (which leads me to believe it's yet another one of her "flavor of the week" identities she takes on and discards because she's still searching for her "real self". But that's neither here nor there. Anyway, do you guys have any reliable tips or tricks to distract yourself during a significant date or holiday? Any advice is appreciated. Title: Re: dBPDsis' birthday on 8/13 - Any Advice for how to deal? Post by: Kwamina on August 11, 2015, 10:15:17 AM Hi Meadowslark
BPDsis claims to be transgender, but doesn't make any progress towards even slight transition (which leads me to believe it's yet another one of her "flavor of the week" identities she takes on and discards because she's still searching for her "real self". But that's neither here nor there. This is interesting. Since when has your sister been saying that she is transgender? Did anything happen in her life right around the time she started making this claim? Anyway, do you guys have any reliable tips or tricks to distract yourself during a significant date or holiday? Any advice is appreciated. Perhaps it might help to do some things you really like doing. If you like watching movies, go see one. Or read a book if that's what you like or go out somewhere. Other things that might help is some intensive physical excercise to get your mind of things and naturally tire yourself out. This way you'll have less time and energy for ruminating. Title: Re: dBPDsis' birthday on 8/13 - Any Advice for how to deal? Post by: Meadowslark on August 12, 2015, 09:33:05 AM This is interesting. Since when has your sister been saying that she is transgender? Did anything happen in her life right around the time she started making this claim? She had come home from her stay at a hospital for suicidal threats about 2 years ago. Since then, she has said she's transgender, but continues to dress and style herself in feminine ways (wears heeled shoes, dresses and makeup). She takes no steps beyond occasionally wearing a male-cut shirt and boxers. She hasn't gone to therapy (which is one of the first steps to transition), hasn't gone to the doctor to ask for hormones, hasn't even changed her birth name to the name she's using now. It's very strange. It's kind of like if BPD was a style of dress - it's very contradictory. She's done this before, but replace "transgender" with "goth", "punk" and "emo". Perhaps it might help to do some things you really like doing. If you like watching movies, go see one. Or read a book if that's what you like or go out somewhere. Other things that might help is some intensive physical excercise to get your mind of things and naturally tire yourself out. This way you'll have less time and energy for ruminating. Very good idea. I'm thinking my BF and some friends might get together that day for some D&:). n_n |