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Despite all that's happened in sense I miss the "drama"... I don't miss her as a person but the past few months have been so crazy(irrational jealousy, intense love/hate, triangulation, mixed messages , hot cold) it feels odd to live in calm/peaceful place mentally.

can anyone relate?

I definitely get it! I think I have this feeling of dread that some sort of terrible drama is going to erupt whenever I check my phone, go home, check facebook etc. So then it's unsettling for things to be so quiet. My evenings living with her were a nonstop barrage of trying to validate her dysregulated emotions, and now it's just me and the TV.

I think part of me is also expecting that she'll try to contact me more and beg me to take her back. Maybe even hoping for that, although I wouldn't take her back. It would be nice to know there was a real person under there who loves me and regrets losing me... .but I guess there wasn't.

What do you miss about the drama?

I can relate to your first paragraph... I just ate some dinner , kicked my feet up... Dead silence... No more random texts about "I saw so and so" talking about girls she perceived that were "in to me" ... Honestly I just miss "controlled drama" for example one day she stormed out of a social event , slammed the door... And sent me a text saying "you don't care about me blah blah" so I calmly step out try not to react but I don't know where she's gone... Try to call her but no answer... Keeps telling me I don't care... So I jog to where I think she is... Kind of intercept her in a sense... Then she's basically cursing me out in the street, cars flying by , someone stopped and asked are you okay? It was kind of exciting in a sense... I eventually diffuse it but that kind of controlled drama I didn't mind... Because it made it seem  like  she really cared about me

It is strange that we "miss the drama". I wouldn't say I miss it but I expected it. It become the norm. When that goes it feels strange.

There is a similar thing amongst veterans from Iraq and Afghanistan (Im sure other conflicts as well). They returned from a high conflict situation where they were constantly on edge and found the peace and normality unsettling. I know a lot that had volunteered to go back on tour as they couldn't handle the peace.

I am about 6 months total out (3 months therapeutic separation and 3 months total separation) and this is one of the most frustrating things in my own recovery.  Normal events like someone I am spending time with getting frustrated over things unrelated to me make me anxious and I realize now that I am seriously expecting a rage to come out of it.  That was my normal experience for most of a decade so I intellectually understand it but hate it when it happens.  Thankfully, I'm aware of it and while it sucks when it happens, I am also aware that it passes much quicker than it used to for me.  A similar event with my stbxh who is undiagnosed would have left me stressing for days. Now the feeling of anxiety is over in a couple hours.  It's progress, but I am truly looking forward to the time when I can have a normal reaction to others' frustration... .empathy without a need to "fix" it or deflect it. 

Yes it feels kind of awkward but i can never ever miss it. If i wanted excitement i'd be a race car driver or stunt driver etc.