BPDFamily.com

I thought I would ask if people know of good information, books, videos, websites or resources with information for people with BPD. I have been trying to find info and have difficulty working out what is good from the other perspective as I can find lots of useful resources from my own perspective as the partner.

In particular information which would enlighten and be identifiable for someone with BPD to see how it has been effecting their lives. It seems difficult to find such content for the person with BPD that does not focus on the strict and simplistic medical definitions of the 9 traits without expanding on how they apply in a broader sense in ones life. It also tends to be quite alarming to read.

Do you have a partner whom has found particular resources helpful? Have you found a particular resource from a first hand experience of BPD that seemed useful? Would appreciate people sharing anything that might help someone with BPD identify with the effects on their lives and even ways to improve their lives.

Hi polari$,

It sounds like you are the one trying to find info for the pwBPD in your life, right?

You may find what you need here as a jumping off point:

Resources for BPD Sufferers (http://www.bpdresources.net)

We also have this, from a recovered member who had BPD:

BPD Behaviors: How it feels to have BPD (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=67059.0)

Let me know if this helps.

What else is going on, and how can we help?

Turkish

Not my experience.   My partner has just graduated after 9 years in therapy and no longer matches the diagnostic criteria for BPD, and that was all accomplished with out every mentioning the words Borderline Personality Disorder.   What was helpful was to concentrate on how my partner expressed her thoughts and feelings and not clinical terms and definitions.   For us labeling wasn't as important as listening.   Early on here the advice I got was to focus on symptoms and behaviors and how to respond to them.   As they weren't mine to fix.   And the other piece of advice I got was pay attention to my own side of the street.    At the time I thought I was doing a pretty good job of that but now looking back with 20/20 hindsight I can see where I wandered over the dotted center line.


This isn't exactly what you are looking for.    But I will recommend it because I think it is the best book I have ever read on the topic of BPD/NPD.   The title is a little misleading.   

Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist (https://bpdfamily.com/book-reviews/stop-caretaking-borderline-or-narcissist)


I liked the book for a couple of reasons.   It gave the best non clinical definition of BPD I have ever read.   The examples were easy to relate to.   And it provided a blue print of what my actions/behaviors/responses should be in the relationship I found myself in.

'ducks

Thanks, I was particularly after resources for a person with BPD, because this is what they are after. I have read many books myself, but not the one you have recommended so I will see about ordering it for myself.