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Junior has done it again. By "it" I mean, driven away more people with his lunacy. I should feel vindicated by this; instead I feel sad. No one deserves the psychological warfare that is his "friendship". I hope he gets help one day, and stops hurting others.

I hope my ex gets help one day and stops hurting herself.

Omg, its not my fault. He has screwed others too (including his now ex who contacted me). He tossed her like garbage, and moved on to the next. I feel sorry for her, she has no clue about cluster b. He also was a repeated no show with others who then dumped him.

For 7 months I beat the crap out of myself wondering what I did wrong. You guys were right. This was going to happen regardless.

How are you C.Stein?

I'm a mess, cycling between hate, love, anger, sadness, numbness, acceptance ... .rinse and repeat.  At least the almost constant anxiety and tears in my eyes are almost gone ... .6 weeks later.  Not to say I'm not still experiencing those, but at least it's not constant anymore ... .kinda.   Almost want the numbness I was feeling right after the last discard to return.  :)amned frustrating.

I see from your posts you are getting to a better place ... .more or less.  Accurate assessment?

For what its worth, you are doing much better at six weeks out than I was. I was suicidal and spent some entire days just sitting catatonic in a dark room. Other times I simply drank until I passed out.  Gosh I am sorry for what you are going through. It sounds like things have been real rough. I disagree that was a kind goodbye she sent,btw. Imo it was cold and rotten. Clearly you are a good man, and she does not deserve you.

It's been 3.5 months.  The first two months I was still numb from the  relationship, wasn't really feeling anything.  PTSD?  Then the emotions started coming back ... .and now I am here.  I'd be lying if I said the thought of dying didn't cross my mind, but not in a suicidal way.  I sure hope you are feeling better and not thinking about that stuff anymore.  

We said our "goodbyes" in person 3 weeks before that email.  She was the same in person as in her email.   It was not a kind email she sent, very cold and detached.  I could even hear the contemptuous undertone in the words.  She knew what it would do to me and simply didn't care at all.   It's not the first time she did something like that to me either ... .intentionally do something she knew would hurt me.  This is not surprising given she rarely took my feelings into consideration during our relationship.  I'm not totally innocent though.  In times of anger I may have said some hurtful things when I let her push me over the edge.  I did call her a pathological liar during the blow-up that ended in the second discard.   That really really bothered her ... .not really sure why unless she feels there might be some truth in that "label"?

What hurts the most is the complete lack of emotions towards me.  She hasn't once acknowledged we even had a relationship, that she had any feelings for me at all, shown any remorse ... .or anything.  I have become a complete waste of space and time to her.  Really really hurts.

You know, I understand what you mean. He will get help one day.

Indeed Beach! But now, it's time to focus on your well-being :)

C.Stein: The complete lack of emotions was hard. Even harder than the contempt he had during the breakup. I feel your pain. Thankfully I am in a better place now, but still have my days. Thats the thing too: we are all different, and there should be no time limit on grieving (nor should you allow someone to give you one). Even small steps are progress. Are you seeing a therapist?

hurting300: yeah I hope so. He dumped me after we lost a child (said It was my fault).  Months later I find out my replacement is pregnant too but he dumped her becausecshe refused to have an abortion. The contradiction  can make you head spin. lol.  How are you today?

Franz: being able to stop blaming myself will help immensely. how have you been.