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Ive been seperated now from my dbp, scitzophenic undBPD ex for 14weeks 6 weeks nc other than some drunken abusive texts. The 3yr relationship was text book BPD with three stages seducer, needy/clingy, then a year and a bit of her raging and constant conflict culminating in her trying to have me arrested. Now i was just reading about sociopaths and that coldness, inability to offer emotional compassion plus her mirroring and vampiring is her so can anyone explain if they can be both and whats the difference. 

True sociopaths are just predators! Con artists. No conscience at all. No emotional attachment to you or anyone. Very transient and move a lot. A BPD person is more clingy and needy, sociopaths put on a good show for your attention. But are never really needy. Unless to manipulate . But they tend not to rage. Bc they don't feel any emotions . BPD lack empathy and can cheat often because of it and their extreme selfishness . They also lack object consistency so it doesn't affect them too much. They care more about their needs and abandonment issues/ fear of engulfment. Borderlines may not set out to use you and be destructive maliciously Luke sociopaths but they do it just the same! Because they are very ill and selfish and terrible morals and ethics that are driven by the fears and wiring in their brain! They still know right from wrong it's no excuse. But they would do it to anyone . It's who they are untreated

Borderlines act out of self-preservation, sociopaths out of pure malicious pleasure.

The cycles - idealize, devalue, discard - are the same, but the motivations are entirely different.

When I read some of the more extreme stories on here I do wonder if the ex in question is a sociopath. The more extreme the behaviours, the harder it is to reconcile the perpetrator as suffering from BPD.


Fanny

My ex wanted me to suffer and intentionally made me hurt by saying and doing things in in front of me and there was a smile on her face while I was hurt or angry. Isn't it this a sociopath ?

Well, no... .BPDs may hurt intentionally, but they do this as defence against "perceived wrongs" received from their partner. ASPD involves hugely many aspects of an individual life, not just romantic relationships... .

Core reasons behind ASPD are very different than BPD ones, you may want to read here:

www.universitypsychiatry.com/clientuploads/picp/11_PICPs.pdf

She may also has traits of ASPD, as we know from studies in 80% of cases BPD is followed by another personality disorder.

Thank you for your response to my post. I was interest in your statement about 80% moving from BPD to another disorder. my ex escalated over a period of 18mths from raging to in the end trying to have me arrested and treated for domestic violence. The fact was I never touched her it was her who did all the yelling all I was trying to do was to push her to accept that her behaviour was escalating, an that maybe if we got some help and she developed her own interests it may help. Obviously it didn't work and she hs been gone for 15 weeks NC for 6 weeks. Its broken my heart to find out that she spent the 18months trying to convince friends that I was abusive and that since breaking up she has been telling all of her friends that I abused controlled even raped her, tht I have serious problems which I refuse to get help with.

Its not that they move to another disorder its that they have other traits from other disorders. There is a high case of co morbidity with BPD and other disorders.

If you think there are I believe 33 cluster B criterias. 9 for BPD. A person could have 6 BPD criterias (so is classed as BPD) but also could have some from other disorders. This is where it becomes confusing as the majority of the behaviour is BPD but then you get some that just doesn't fit with BPD so it makes us unsure what we are dealing with.

I hope that makes sense.