BPDFamily.com

Well I have been nc with my ex BPD gf for 5 months and we just bumped into each other down the street see looked at me and looked away,  no wave no nothing at all,  she had her son with her and nothing at all,  it has actually ripped my heart out to know things have  actually turned out like this I was hoping down the track maybe we could of been friends so I could  see her son that I spend seven years with,  I'm completely heart broken

Seven years and not even a nod or a hello.  I feel really sad for you.  Sending you a hug. 

Yeah I'm completely broken,  so lost and hurt don't know what to do l

I feel with you ,umm, think of it this way she might have been stunned by running into you also ,and reacted like a BPD would in her own way ?

I think it a complete sigh to say she hates me and there's no hope ever of being friends not even down the track

I think it is a sign that they can't handle seeing you... .it's the toddler ignoring you since you have been "ignoring" her. You just have to keep that toddler idea in your head when dealing with them... .seriously. Do you really want to be friends with a toddler? That's what I have to remember myself... .it's really the way it is unfortunately. If you have ever seen "The Nanny" show, if you use the techniques she uses to get control in a household, you can make it work with the personality disordered person. I saw a video on the subject.  You just have to decide if you want any form of relationship with a 3 year old in an adult body, ; )

We live in a small town so things would be alot easier if we could be normal,  that and I know she has heard Iam seeing  her worst enemy and friends with her which is not true,  I know I can't control what she thinks or hears but to bump into her after all this time and have nothing at all just guts me,  I can't get over her and she hates me just seems like a complete waste of time the whole 6 years we had together

Same here we are 2 years seperated except for the fact that we don't have children. Moreover, mine does not even look at me. I am starting to think that this avoidance will be forever.

What was the toddlers reaction?

I think by ignoring you or not contacting you, they don't have to take ownership of any part of responsibility for the end of the relationship! In reality the end is usually almost all their making, by lies, cheating, or whatever they've done . Not saying we were guilt free. But they can't handle being wrong at all. I'm sure down the road after more failed relationships, her mind will wonder back to you, 7 years of memories. Most people won't put up with people with BPD that long, hence the term "short stormy relationship ships" you may be the one that got away in 5 plus years . Or 10 plus years, you may never know though. It sucks . I'm sorry I feel the same way

I can agree with this as I believe this is how my ex is handling everything.  Blame will not be placed on her shoulders and I am certain in her mind everything that led up to the final discard, no matter how wrong it was, was justified and excusable.  The finger will always point anywhere other than at herself.

Sorry about this, I can only imagine your pain.  But the reality, if this helps, is that she was and is incapable of normal love.  She may even be ashamed.  Who knows, but they are an enigma that we should not care to figure out anymore because we cannot. And that is why you are in pain because it just doesn't make sense as hard as you try to make sense of it.

It's definitely hard when l was hoping we could or would be able to talk down the track as she does have a child l spent the 7 years with aswell,  he was there when I bumped into her l dont think he realised it was me he had his head stuck in a book thanks goodness,  just really battle with how iItry to seek forgiveness still and tell myself imust forgive to move on but then I see she hates me like completely and leaves me wondering what I ever did so wrong