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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: unicorn2014 on November 29, 2015, 05:07:00 AM



Title: Roadblocks on the path
Post by: unicorn2014 on November 29, 2015, 05:07:00 AM
I'm on step 20 in the healing process and I have hit a roadblock to thriving : my career. I'm currently very challenged to build a new career while being a single mother. I have a huge resentment against my parents for neglecting me in middle school which is when I needed to be guided to art school. I had an undiagnosed learning disability in math and science and my parents believe my very superior IQ was all I needed to survive in life. There were preoccupied with my brother who has an impairment of one of his senses. Today they pay far more attention to my nephew who has learning disabilities as opposed to my daughter who has been deeply impacted by the fact her father is bipolar, an addict and alcoholic, with sociopathic traits. They have done very little to help me raise her.

My father believed I would find my own way to college. I didn't . I gave up and became an early childhood professional. I now am trying to build a new career as an artist. My mother dropped out of the ceramics department in college . My mother is a narcissist I believe and only could tell me I should go into commercial art. She never did anything to nurture me as an artist. She used my talent to win contests as a young girl and stopped by the time I hit puberty. She was so self absorbed that she did nothing to help me weather adolescence.

Now I am trying as a single mother to get back on the path as an artist and it is very hard.  Every time I think about this a huge resentment against my parents wells up.

I am stuck.


Title: Re: Roadblocks on the path
Post by: Kwamina on November 30, 2015, 04:45:57 AM
Hi unicorn2014

Now I am trying as a single mother to get back on the path as an artist and it is very hard.  Every time I think about this a huge resentment against my parents wells up.

I am glad you are still following your heart and have not abandoned your passion for art |iiii

I understand your feelings of resentment against your parents. Unfortunately we can't change the past and it might also be unlikely that your parents will change anytime soon. As adults the best we can do is to 're-parent' ourselves and be the source of unconditional love and support to ourselves that our parents never were. The adult you can be the loving supportive parent to your inner-child. You recently posted in Ziggiddy's thread about exercises for self-insight. In that thread are also some exercises for inner child work that you might benefit from:

Exercises for self-insight (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=241251.msg12671322#msg12671322)


Title: Re: Roadblocks on the path
Post by: unicorn2014 on December 01, 2015, 01:51:29 AM
Thank you Kwamina, I've heard about that exercise  in adult child recovery meetings.