BPDFamily.com

Today I was informed BPD is in hospital, he has taken a toxic substance and from this has had a heart attack and is in induced sleep.

I'm in total shock. I could feel a crisis coming with him but he was fine a few days ago at the gig, seemed happy with his "new friend" and all. Ugh really want to go see him. I really care about him and feel so helpless. The thought of my daughter without a dad.  i love him very much.

I'm sorry to hear this.  It is tough watching someone you care about destroy themselves like this.  I had a guy who worked with me who destroyed his heart with his "recreational' activities.  They had to put a pace maker in and still he persisted.  When the pace maker failed the doc told him it looked like someone had taken a sledge hammer to it.  I hope he got the clue before he killed himself.  Haven't heard from him for a long time.  I wonder from time to time what happened to him.

Aww  I'm sorry to hear that as well that must of been hard.

Do you think it would be appropriate to go and see him?

Only you can answer that question.  It would be the decent thing to do, even just as a friend.  If it is going to set you back or send the wrong signals then maybe there is something else you could do or you can prepare yourself mentally?   He is the father of your daughter ... , right?  You can't really totally get him out of your life, so maybe this is a good opportunity to just be a concerned friend?

That's what I want to to be. It's not really going to set me back or anything I'm more worried about him than anything. I know he's treated me like ___ but I'm not heartless. I see good in him despite how cold he is. I think I'll go see him tomorrow or Friday, I'd feel awful if I didn't. My folks were like "pfft he wouldn't visit you" yeah he maybe wouldn't but I'm not him am I.

I know I can't get rid of him completely I want him to be involved in her life as much as possible, that's what I want more than anything. I was gonna cut to LC to just email so I could heal but right in this moment that doesn't seem top of my list.

His mum let me know, we get on ok. Would it be again, be inapproiate of me to ask if I could see him?

Why do you feel you need to ask?

I don't know my heads messed right now.

Eat a piece of chocolate. 

I'm sorry but I really don't appreciate your attitude.

   No worries.  Be yourself and do what you feel is right.

Climbmountains91,

Sometimes I feel like I know what's right for me and I go to people that I trust to get a second opinion. I think that it helps to ask so that we get a balanced perspective and sometimes others will see something that we don't see. I can appreciate that from supportive people. We give each other advice :)

You have a history with your ex and he is your D's father. Family members were not in your relationship and they may also mean well and dont want you to get hurt. I agree with you, he's likely not aware of his behaviors and how they hurt others. He is who he is. If you care about him, I think that you have the right idea with visiting him. I would feel the same way and visit my ex wife in the hospital.

I do agree that you doing the right thing visiting him at the hospital, especially you're doing it from your heart .

I hope he gets better soon .

Guy .

So hes had a brain scan that's all normal and there waking him up tomorrow. I asked his mum about visitors but she said maybe next week and will let me know.

I'm glad he's ok.

That's good news.