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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: guy4caligirl on December 14, 2015, 12:08:27 AM



Title: I want to reconcile with my ex BPD what kind of Boundaries should i set in stone
Post by: guy4caligirl on December 14, 2015, 12:08:27 AM
I was in a five years R/S with my ex now 15 months after B/u  , I have been on this site for that since last year November 2014 , I learned a lot about the disorder ,I am thinking I should be able to manage the relationship better with a fair to good knowledge about this illness.

Please help me make a list of boundaries for both of us to go by so we can have a better go at it this time ,it's been hard without her but I hope it will be better with her now that  I learned a lot and wanting to learn more how to deal with her in a more constructive way ,she knows she is Bipolar and also BPD takes meds , got to the point where it's time to get better as she said , she just repeated a relationship with this guy for 14 months almost the same pattern she did when with me and forced him to do exactly what I did to her, forced her to move out ... .Rinse rather repeat .

Your comments, advises are welcome with an open heart

Thank you all in advance.


Title: Re: I want to reconcile with my ex BPD what kind of Boundaries should i set in stone
Post by: itgirl on December 14, 2015, 06:02:10 AM
I have followed your story and I know that you have had enough advice of people warning you that you are jumping off a cliff to rescue her.  I noticed that you would “get it” on the site and then as soon as she texted you lose all focus.  For example you keep insisting that you are no contact cause you don’t initiate but when she phones, you offer her a job/place to stay and your HEART. 

My advice is to take it slow.  Try and stick to the knowledge you learned here.    I had 4 recycles with my partner and I WISHED I didn’t just fall back in the same routine.  Especially living together and rescuing her.