BPDFamily.com

Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: behindme on December 20, 2015, 09:33:06 PM



Title: False pregnancy claims?
Post by: behindme on December 20, 2015, 09:33:06 PM
I never thought I'd be back here after my son successfully recognized and divorced a uBPD two years ago. Unfortunately, and perhaps not all that surprisingly, he fell into another relationship that I mentioned early in had some red flags but once again he admits now he was taken in by charm and deception. Now that they've broken up, this woman, who has three children by two different men from her past but is only raising her middle one, who is 16, claims she's pregnant after she realized the break up was final on his part. My so is beside himself, claiming they always used protection, had not even had regular relations in the past few months and that she had her period the end of October - which she now says was a "false" period and sent my son a 10 week ultrasound dated early December in the middle of the night. She's nearly 37' has not had a pregnancy in 14 years. The whole thing sounds entirely fishy to me - if it was anyone but my son I'd say it was a hoax to try to get him back,as she already said to him afterward she would do anything to make them a family. But of course she's refused to have him come to any OB appointments, saying she hasn't scheduled a next one - odd again as that's normally done as a matter of course. When he stated he wanted to have a paternity test she got angry and said not to contact her anymore. She'd call when the baby is born and he can have the testing performed then.  What does she do but emails him the next day about an entirely different matter.  

Naturally our son feels, in his word, stupid,for falling for this type of personality again and has started with a therapist but he's a wreck not knowing. We said we'd help out with assisting e wn with full custody if it's true... .but highly doubt it is.  Has anyone ever hired a private detective in such cases? HIPAA would make confirming medical info difficult but I think there would likely be something to prove her instability and false allegations with some degree of reliability. I myself determined there are websites that do phony pg sonograms but that's not proof enough.  Thoughts? Similar experiences?


Title: Re: False pregnancy claims?
Post by: Kwamina on December 22, 2015, 07:08:34 AM
Hi behindme

This is a very unpleasant situation to be in. What were the red flags you saw early on in this relationship?

Given what your son has also been through in the past with his uBPD ex-wife, I think it's a positive step that he's now getting some support to help him process his experiences and reflect on his own choices.

Your son had already broken up with her so I can understand how getting this news would come as such a shock to him. Does she have a history of telling lies?

Was there a specific event that led up to him breaking up with her or was it more like a culmination of several things?