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Title: It was awful Why do i miss him? Post by: chili36 on December 21, 2015, 01:47:57 PM I am recently divorced after 29 years of pain and heartache, cheating and lies. I have moved away, have a new home and a new car and job. So... .why do I miss him so bad? I get thinking about him and want to see him, then when I do see him, I am disgusted by him and his behavior and can't wait to get away from him. I haven't spoken to him or seen him in 2 months but i think I miss him. i am a mess
Title: Re: It was awful Why do i miss him? Post by: once removed on December 21, 2015, 03:46:48 PM hey chili36 and *welcome*
youre in good company. i think many of us ask ourselves this question; i spent a couple of months myself thinking something was wrong with me for still having feelings for my ex. nothing was wrong with me, i was grieving. you were in a twenty nine year marriage, chili36. it seems perfectly normal to me that you would miss this person. having said that, given the loaded bond of a relationship with a pwBPD, and as you describe, the heartache, cheating and lies, it also makes perfect sense that your feelings would be quite conflicted. you mention it has only been two months; detaching, healing, and resolving your feelings (seeing a bigger, clearer picture) are going to take time and processing and grieving. for that, again, you are in very good company. please keep reading and posting. it helps to talk. would you like to tell us a bit more of your story so we can better understand your situation? Title: Re: It was awful Why do i miss him? Post by: Popcorn71 on December 22, 2015, 01:15:01 PM This is something I have been asking myself lately. I have come to the conclusion that it isn't 'him' that I miss, it's just having somebody and the lifestyle we had. My life is so very different now, mostly better but in some ways not so good.
Maybe there is something else that you are missing, not specifically him? It sounds like you have had a lot of changes to deal with too. |