Print Page - Attempted Recycle/Baiting by Her

It's been a long time folks, sorry if I forget my acronyms for this forum.

First a primer / some background:

1.5 years since we broke up

We bumped into each other at a pub 6 months ago - wished her well, it was civil, brief and polite

Other than that I can call it 1.5 years successful NC :)

Her last 1.5 years (I put this together from common friends):

My replacement moved in with her 1 week later after our breakup

6 months later they breakup and she moves in with another guy out of town

1 year later she moves out of his place and into her own place back here in town

Drumroll... .She messaged me last weekend, and it messed with me a bit. Instant panic attack, flood of emotions, a flood of sexual feelings, etc.

She basically let me know she was back, how great she was doing, that her new place had a hot tub and that I should come over and 'show her how to use it'.

*We used to have sex in my tub all the time

Her attempted recycle or baiting attempt didn't work.

She probably saw my social media pictures and was feeling lusty, lonely and seeking attention.

I don't blame her for feeling lusty. I poured myself into the gym 3-5 times a week post breakup and went through a personal transformation. At first it was to deal with the hurt, later it became a wonderful and positive part of my life. I went from blob to being muscular, ripped with abs.

I'm glad she saw those photos, but she ain't getting any of this.

I played with the idea of going over to use her like a ragdoll for sex and discarding her (like she did to me).

Instead, I calmly wrote back and said, "Like I told you before when we bumped into each other - I wish you and your kids all the best. Happy to hear you are doing well. I'm in a different place. An inheritance came thru - and I'm shopping for a winter home. Career has skyrocketed. Thanks for touching base."

Her response was precious. "? I don't understand your response. I wasn't trying to seduce you, I have a BF. I just wanted some advice on my hot tub. Oh well, hope you are doing good."

Nice try vampire. Wow, I sure wouldn't appreciate my GF reaching out to an ex for 'hot tub advice'. Google 'hot tub service technician' next time or call your bloody landlord.

She can die in a fire for all I care. I do have to thank her for 'upping my game' at the gym. I was getting lazy lately, but have increased my workouts and their intensity this week. If I do run into her, my body will be a reminder that I only get better, and better.

"It's about us, it's not about them" - read that here 1.5 years ago and that became my mantra for a while.

hi EWN.

BPDs are only interested in narcissistic supply, if i was you i wouldn't have responded to her text messages and instead stayed completely silent which inflicts the greatest narcissistic injury to a person with BPD.

people with BPD are looking for attention good or bad, even if your response was perceived by you to be bad but for a BPD person it was great news because you gave her attention by responding. every time you make contact with her you are giving away your power and she wouldn't think highly of you, sometimes you might show up on her radar and sometimes you won't, someone that lives with psychosis doesn't have the same feelings that you do. stay NO CONTACT... .

BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: EyesWidenedNow on December 24, 2015, 08:57:53 AM