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Title: My ex keeps moving Post by: past-the-storm on January 14, 2016, 04:57:54 PM My estranged wife has moved home something like 10+ times in the last decade since I've known her and many more times before . It seems as she eventually paints black the people living near her (family/me/friends/ex partners) she then moves on to be near her newly idealised or lesser devalued people in her life in other parts of the country.
My question is,have other members here experienced their former partners with BPD following this pattern? I am really curious to know if this is a common thing for them. Title: Re: My ex keeps moving Post by: patientandclear on January 15, 2016, 09:01:06 AM Yes. About every two years. Jobs and places.
Title: Re: My ex keeps moving Post by: greenmonkey on January 15, 2016, 01:44:33 PM My uBPD ex was constantly on the move - she was unable to have any stability in her life.
Once our relationship ended she reverted back to her old pattern of moving every 3-6 months. To my knowledge in approx 15 months she has moved 6 times. Title: Re: My ex keeps moving Post by: hopealways on January 16, 2016, 01:51:08 AM Hmm interesting never thought about this before but yes mine did also. It is part of the unstable sense of self. Just like they run away from us they run away from where they live.
Title: Re: My ex keeps moving Post by: GoingBack2OC on January 16, 2016, 02:09:03 AM Never really realized it but yes. My ex-girlfriend and I were together almost 5 years. In that time:
Apartment when we met. 6 Months Lived with me - 1 Year Moved Out Needed Space - 1 Year Moved Back In - 3 Months Moved Back Out Wanted Closer to Work - 2 Years If you track back (before i knew her) I'd gather: 1 Year after college at parents College. So in 7 Years. 7 Total Moves. Is that a lot? Also; she just got fired (in December; and now will likely have to move - she moved into a place she really shouldnt have - and told me in 4 months she will be broke). So I guess now 7 years 8 homes. I've lived in my home for 8 years, and my prior home was 5. Title: Re: My ex keeps moving Post by: C.Stein on January 16, 2016, 08:18:17 AM I think the moving is many times about running away from themselves. It is an attempt to "wipe the slate clean". This is not something unique to pwBPD. My ex seemed to believe that she can "start over" in a new location. I told her that while the landscape might change you will not. You cannot run away from yourself and the problems within yourself now will follow you no matter where you go. This is something I learned the hard way.
Oh ... .and my ex is planning on moving out of the area if she hasn't already. |