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Title: last blow up 6 mos ago.when i finally figured out what he suffers from BPD Post by: TantricSpirit on February 07, 2016, 11:26:28 PM He told me to get the ___ out of his house the week before going on a great trip for his b day.
Then i wrote him... what he has... has a name... a bad name... that should be called Emotional Dysregulation Syndrome... .much more accurate... .He was an orphan... made good thru a structured job w lots of hours and a long term marriage... not so good... but the one person ever... .in his life that long... so retiriement must have triggered the bad moods and then the divorce stuff seperated but not legal... really destabilized him... about 8 mos later we met online and it was magical... .the ONLY guy out of several hundred I ever fell for over the years... .YIKES... .that alone makes me feel like i had BPD but i don't:)... In the following 9 mos we were more apart than together... May we actually almost made 1 month... .and then... over nothing... .the devaluation is hard to take even though the relationship with himself is a tragic reality I find sadder than my own pain... .Want to say goodbye and leave it nice... When i have ever truly and deeply loved someone... thats how I log to do it... Our Naturally Tantric Bliss experiences that last for hours and days are truly missed... .I want one more... .say goodbye and make nice... give it all I got... .leave at the TOP,,,and I feel it all so unwise I am not running in the opposite direction... .He is currently mad probably that I sent a response to one of his... a week late... and mentioned BPD... .but I don't feel our connection was b/c of his disease... .I really think its US... .even though none of our spiritual beliefs line up at all... .Shall I persue the one last time... to make it easier on myself... .or let go and see what is best... Yes... I think that is better... .By the way... we are in our mid sixties... .and the enliving and deeply soul melting marathons are truly how you live to be old and healthy... .so YES... Big Hook! Title: Re: last blow up 6 mos ago.when i finally figured out what he suffers from BPD Post by: once removed on February 09, 2016, 12:58:06 AM hey TantricSpirit and *welcome*
im glad you found us. we understand how volatile these relationships can be and im confident many members here can relate to your story. i saw a lot less of my ex in our last nine months as well; somehow it seemed we fought even more :). to answer your question, i agree with your conclusion that focusing on detachment is a more productive course for you. it seems to me you have said your piece. hopefully you have planted a seed. sadly, the outcome is not really under our control. the choice is yours, of course. |