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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: disorderedsociety on February 21, 2016, 10:32:53 PM



Title: Post-Breakup Psychosis in the Non
Post by: disorderedsociety on February 21, 2016, 10:32:53 PM
So, I've had an interesting year since my breakup. The first few months were painful and filled with jealousy at the replacement, and finding out shed gotten pregnant and given me a disease.

The next few months were okay, I started on medication for adult ADHD and made some friends. I went off the stimulants after a while as they didn't seem to help with anything except productivity.

As time went on, I started getting into spirituality more but wound up avoiding others and making correlations between uunrelated events, i.e. X happened, so Y must be true. This turned into paranoia, that my superiors at work were out to get me fired, that people were plotting against me. I've always had a problem with circumstantial speech and OCD but as of late it had gotten to a point where I could hardly string a sentence together.

I've started back on medication, this time adding a small dose of Abilify to stabilize my mood. Imagine paranoia, plus internalized mood swings and magical thinking. Yeah, not pretty.

Anyway this leads me to wonder if anyone who, being predisposed due to lineage, has had a psychotic episode or symptoms triggered by a nasty breakup.

-ds


Title: Re: Post-Breakup Psychosis in the Non
Post by: murphy7083 on February 22, 2016, 03:22:18 AM
Hi - I am sorry to hear you have had this experience - I can on some levels relate

I am 14 months out of a marriage with my uBPDexw  - 8 years together

Lots of crazing making behaviours and perhaps ( me) underlying emotional instability cast me into a cloud of what felt like insanity for some months - a few months pre break up to a few months after, I underwent extensive therapy and gained some insights

I was dissociating a lot - zoning out in work etc and coming back momentarily forgetting where I was and what I was doing

I became paranoid - she was smearing me badly and I was paranoid who was in on it and who believed what

I was dysphoric - at times completely numb

I was outside my body looking on - rather than in full control and comfortable in my own skin

I was anxious as hell - taking the forms of GAD - every thing made me anxious and some even sparked OCD - obsessive compulsive thinking about her, me, my life etc etc

One therapist recommended lexapro to help lift some of this - I was one of the unlucky ones that had a paradoxical reaction and it made me 100 times worse so I stopped it immediately.

How did I get out if all this ?

I went nc, turned all my compassion on myself - massages new sports vacations at home etc

Time has made a huge difference - I have mild anxiety just now and I think it may be the normal amount most people have !

Time and a support network are huge factors

Am I concerned she brought out an underlying mental issue? I was then for sure NOW- there's a plethora of mental health issues in my foo and I was terrified I was going down that route.

I think I had a lot of growing to do in different ways - different demons to slay from FOO toxicities growing up - I faced them all and well I'm pretty sure they have resolved mostly

I sometimes wonder where I was going had we not exploded? How would i ever have got to my very much happier place? In some ways i think she was sent to destroy me so I'd fix the s... .Out of myself