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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: bpdmom1 on March 04, 2016, 10:12:04 PM



Title: Is this typical for BPD
Post by: bpdmom1 on March 04, 2016, 10:12:04 PM
My BPD daughter is in a boarding school.  During a group therapy session while going through her timeline I found out that she had stated some crazy story about a morning she had to go to school after throwing up all over herself from getting drunk the night before.  Of course everyone believed her because they don't know any better.  I know it isn't true as I had to drive her to school every day and she didn't have the opportunity to go to parties to get drunk. 

Is this typically of BPD?  I've seen this behavior over and over again with her making up stories to fit in with whoever she is talking to or to get some attention or a reaction.  It really drives me nuts. 

I could call her on it, but she would insist it did happen.  So that is pointless.  I'm planning to bring it up with her therapist.  I just don't understand why she keeps doing this.


Title: Re: Is this typical for BPD
Post by: AnotherWon on March 04, 2016, 11:08:11 PM
 

When our son (undiagnosed) came home after living away for a year he proudly announced he'd quit smoking.  I was thrilled, but didn't make a huge deal out of it.  And within a day or two he was back at it.  Why say that and then resume the behavior immediately?  I know he wanted to either impress me or just get a quick atta boy, but whyyyyyy?  Also told his sister he broke up with girlfriend when he got dumped big time.  He's always lied, though, and I'm sure his self-esteem is the reason, but it's truly mind-boggling for the rest of us.  God only knows what he must tell strangers and acquaintances.


Title: Re: Is this typical for BPD
Post by: lbjnltx on March 05, 2016, 06:46:13 AM
Yep... .my d did the same thing in the early period of RTC group.  Many of the girls had drug problems... .my d did not.  Like you, I knew the comings and goings of my d almost every single hour of the day (we lived in a very rural area and she was too young to drive at the time).

She told the group that she had smoked marijuana... .not true.  She was "fronting" with the group to feel accepted. 

When she began to get honest and stop the fronting she confessed the lie she told them and they validated her feelings while holding her accountable.  Positive peer pressure is highly affective for most teen girls.   If you haven't heard of PPC (Positive Peer Culture) you can read up on it.  It was the foundation of my d's progress and we still work from that PPC foundation today.

lbj


Title: Re: Is this typical for BPD
Post by: bpdmom1 on March 05, 2016, 09:08:54 AM
Would I ask what group therapy model they are using?

I hope someday she won't feel the need to tell stories.


Title: Re: Is this typical for BPD
Post by: lbjnltx on March 05, 2016, 09:33:27 AM
Positive Peer Culture (PPC)

Brief Description

PPC is a peer-helping model designed to improve social competence and cultivate strengths in youth. “Care and concern” for others (or “social interest”) is the defining element of PPC. Rather than demanding obedience to authority or peers, PPC demands responsibility, empowering youth to discover their greatness. Caring is made fashionable and any hurting behavior totally unacceptable. PPC assumes that as group members learn to trust, respect, and take responsibility for the actions of others, norms can be established. These norms not only extinguish antisocial conduct, but more importantly reinforce pro-social attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors. Positive values and behavioral change are achieved through the peer-helping process. Helping others increases self-worth. As one becomes more committed to caring for others, s/he abandons hurtful behaviors.

Program Goals:

The overall goals of Positive Peer Culture (PPC) are:

Meet the universal growth needs of youth for affiliation, achievement, autonomy, and altruism

Improve social competence

Cultivate strengths in youth

Convert negative peer influence into care and concern for others

Developing social interest through leadership and guidance from trained adults

The essential components of Positive Peer Culture (PPC) include:

Meeting universal growth needs

Total therapeutic milieu approach

Building group responsibility: Group members learn to keep one another out of trouble, much as they would be expected to do with their siblings at home.

The group meeting: Serves as the problem-solving arena in which youth are able to help one of their peers in a safe environment; meetings are structured: problem reporting, awarding the meeting, problem solving, group leader’s summary. A distinct problem list is used in the program to ensure a universal language.

Service learning: Youth are engaged in multiple community projects, developed to reinforce the value of helping others; many projects are conducted along side adult service clubs. Youth are taught that community service is an expected part of community living, not a punishment for misbehavior. In the context of a Positive Peer Culture program, service learning is not simply a program component — service learning is meant to develop a life-style of community responsibility and action.

Teamwork primacy: A highly successful program management model, which assumes that “teamwork” is the highest administrative priority. Staff teams are organized around distinct groups of children.

Recommended group size: 8-12 youth

Positive Peer Culture (PPC)   directly provides services to children/adolescents and addresses the following:

Experienced adverse childhood experiences and may not have developmental needs met

Services Involve Family/Support Structures:

This program involves the family or other support systems in the individual's treatment: Parent and family involvement is an essential element in programs using PPC.


Recommended Intensity:

45-90-minute structured group meetings depending on the setting and the participants, ideally 5 times per week

Recommended Duration:

Participation is typically 6-9 months.

This program is typically conducted in a(n):

Outpatient Clinic

Residential Care Facility

School









from:  www.cebc4cw.org/program/positive-peer-culture/detailed