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After many months of nagging and pleading we've finally capitulated and allowed our daughter to get a dog for emotional support.  To be clear, we already have a family dog, but she never really took to it, and she has wanted one of her own.  She swears that this will be the "thing" that motivates her to get better.  My wife and I have been very skeptical of this whole idea, because she has a long history of trying to fill her emotional holes with "stuff", with only short-term relief.  (I just realized that could be said about just about anybody in the first-world, LOlL).  In any case, we finally allowed it for two reasons- it's a low risk gamble, in that my wife and I both love dogs and so it's not like the dog will be homeless if it doesn't work out, and secondly because we had reached the point where we were considering long-term residential treatment for her, along with the enormous expense that involves.  I just thought it would be absurd to spend 30 to 40 thousand dollars for RTC without at least trying the pet thing.  I think a lot of us can look back at our lives and identify a "thing" or "event" that turned it around for us, where we started to get our stuff together, and for many of us that was children, something forcing us to look outside ourselves and put our own needs in the backseat, which I frankly think is one of the big keys to contentment.  We are so hoping that the care, maintenance, and unconditional love involved with her very own pet will turn things around for her.  At the same time, we're being realistic about it.  She has had her own cat for several years and that brings her some comfort, but as you know cats are just not dogs (sorry cat lovers).

There are many residential treatment centers for teens with Reactive Attachment Disorder that use a canine based program therapeutically.   

My d is very attached to her dog and it gives her a great feeling to know that someone outside herself loves her unconditionally (other than family) and depends on her for all of it's care.

What kind of dog is she looking at?  I think most of the RTC's use golden retrievers.

lbj

Its a great Pyrenees and Anatolian mix- supposed to be loyal, loving and on the lazy side, al good things for her. Drawback- huge dog. Also good and protective of other animals, important because we have another dog and two cats.  Thank God we vot rid of the rabbits 

Hi there, 

My BPDD33 doesn't live with us but about 18 months ago got a wonderful small dog.  We were nervous at the time as we didn't think she was well, had a full-time job which meant she had to spend lots on dog sitters while working shifts etc etc.  However, although this little dog didn't prevent her going into serious crisis with numerous hospitalizations that left me looking after the dog, I have to say that it did seem to give her a reason to get better. 

I got very fond of the dog too and a side benefit was that I got lots of exercise I wouldn't have normally got -mostly in the rain though as I am in the UK.

As soon as my daughter's condition improved and she got home she got another puppy!  I made it quite clear that I wouldn't look after 2 dogs (you can see a thread I posted about it somewhere below).  Well, although I had serious reservations, this puppy has seemed to help my daughter enormously so far.  She loves both dogs (both very small ones) and their unconditional love of her seems so far to be working well in giving her a 'raison d'être'.  The dogs have company in each other which my daughter says takes the pressure off her slightly for being the sole focus of attention of the first dog which at times stressed her out.  It also gets my daughter out of the house and getting some exercise every day, which I think is so important for her mental health.  She is also caring for them really well.

I get constant pictures of them and messages from my d eulogizing about them which I can happily validate as they are incredibly sweet.

I wish you luck and hope you benefit as much as my daughter is doing so far. :)

Update: we've had the dog for about a week now.  So far, so good.  It does seem to help her engage with the world and provide some fun for her.  It's still a very new thing so much remains to be seen, but optimistic so far.

Big M

I do think a pet can make a huge impact on our kids. We recently got our dd a parakeet. She really loves the little bird although at times she has been convinced it was sick but that is a whole other post. Mostly she really loves spending time with her bird and it has helped her. I think a puppy would be great but I don't think she is in a place right now to take on that kind of commitment. I am glad your dd is doing so well.

Just following up on this post.  The dog has not worked out in terms of helping her.  She loves the dog, but spends just a few minutes a day with him at most.  His care, of course, is left to us.  Surprise level zero.  There is a part of me that would love to find another home for this dog to teach her a lesson, but I know that lesson would not be absorbed anyway, and only the dog and the rest of us would suffer.  I cannot recommend a therapy dog in general, and a Great Pyr needs to be worked, something this child is just not willing to do.