BPDFamily.com

My BPDxbf sent me this summary about what he's been taught in Schema Therapy and a battering programme about dealing with triggers:


When we’re triggered, we feel intense negative emotions about a situation or event (anger, panic, sadness etc). We usually have fixed associations around our triggers (i.e. we make a connection between certain events and extreme emotions). We usually have a fixed response to a trigger (reactions such as avoidance or violence). We usually feel triggers are beyond our control and that they occur in the outside world. We can reduce the effect of triggers by using these steps:

• Accept that the trigger is inside your head and not in the outside world. The event that starts the trigger may be external, but it is your perception of that event and the emotional significance you attach to the event that makes it feel so big.



• Become aware of your triggers. Certain events will keep triggering you. Keeping a record of those events will help you find common threads between events and triggers.



• Find out what’s underneath the trigger. This can take time, but as you record the triggering events, write down any thoughts and feelings that occur around the event. This can help reduce the effect by identifying the underlying needs of the trigger.



• Allow the feelings that are triggered to come. Part of the reason that emotions overwhelm you is that you push the emotions down or associate them with something else.



• Change your behaviour. The essence of a trigger is that it is constant, and this is often precipitated by how you react. If you can change how we react or respond, you might be able to reduce the impact of the trigger.

I find myself wondering to what extent triggers in pwBPD differ from triggers in nons. I'd welcome any thoughts or comments.


Love Lifewriter x

They are much the same but amplified, most nons subconsciously apply these methods most of the time. For a pwBPD it is complicated further because they misread things to see triggers where others wouldn't.

For example being attacked triggers fight or flight. Same for everyone, the difference is the pwBPD interprets the actions of others as being attacked, when in fact no such intent is meant.