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My mother is preoccupied with other people's dishonesty however she is quite prone to dishonesty herself.

Latest fiasco: this week my mother had to have oral surgery because she needed a tooth extracted and a bone graft. That was her excuse for not being able to meet for coffee after work on Monday even though I would be the one traveling to see her. So this week I ended up chipping a wisdom tooth that had three fillings in it due to grinding my teeth during my sleep and now I will have to have it extracted because I can not afford a crown. I'm already paying off $1700 dollars of dental debt because I was seeing a private dentist who wouldn't accept my insurance. My father doesn't only not have sympathy for me, my mother gets to have all the sympathy but I'm not even allowed to talk about my dental problems.

When I texted my mother to ask about her recovery and to tell her about the irony of my needing an extraction to she told me she had limited texting and would email me tomorrow. That was three days ago and I haven't heard a peep from her. Of course I'm also not allowed to talk about my anger or my disappointment that she treats me that way so I'm stuck with my negative feelings.

I do have a phone number to call to find a therapist who will accept my insurance, as I have two forms of insurance which makes it hard for me to find a therapist. I've had so much going on with my daughter and my probate case that's it been hard for me to look after my own needs.

On another note the probate case that my mother and brother pushed my father to initiate has appeared to have resulted in me losing the income from my grandmother's trust. Nobody else is so far apparently adversely affected by this case and nobody seems to care what happened to me. Once again I am stuck with the uncomfortable feelings of anger, resentment, disappointment as well as feeling like I was taken advantage of.

What a sucky situation, I'm sorry you're going through this.

It feels rotten when you can't even confide in your mother that you're feeling upset about an illness or health issue. I'm in that same boat. Any ailment I've had, she's also had and it was way worse. It's all about them and their experience. Empathy from them feels impossible. I can't even comment that I'm turning 40 because she's turning 60 and that's worse. Just wanted to say "I feel you" on this post. Hope your tooth is better soon! I'm going for a root canal this month and I'm pretty anxious about it too.

Thank you Amelia. I learned as a child that when I told my mother I was sick that made it worse. I wasn't looking to confide in my mother. I resent the fact that I'm supposed to feel empathy for her but she won't feel empathy for me, not just by her, but also by my father.

My tooth is going to be extracted later this week, I haven't had an extraction since I was a child and that is part of my family lore. I had to have two teeth extracted as a child because there was not enough room in my mouth for all my permanent teeth and one of the teeth broke as my dentist was extracting it so my parents had to take me on the bus to the oral surgeon. Rather then comfort me, my mother got upset at the dentist who broke the tooth and the inconvenience of having to take me on the bus with a broken tooth. My parents didn't even call a cab.

I've had 3 roots canals, if not 4. They're not fun, but they do the job and once you recover there are no more problems. You'll be fine!