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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Tony73 on May 02, 2016, 04:11:27 PM



Title: Bpd.gf
Post by: Tony73 on May 02, 2016, 04:11:27 PM
  I have a gf with BPD who is the.most.aggressive violent.lady I have ever met. But she can be so.loving and when I asked.why she.can't be that loving person.all the.time she ses.she can't... she's been alcoholic for 12 years and has tried to stop she has managed to do a professional detox 6 times but she says she needs alcohol to feel normal. She physically attacked.me last night and.I ended up slapping her... I have never hit a.lady in my life and I feel shocking! She told.me.she deserved it but I can't accept.What I did. I have been with her 6months.but I've never.felt.So drained she is.kicking.off every night she has.meds but they.don't make.much.difference.dont.know.What to do. And.she refuses to eat.


Title: Re: Bpd.gf
Post by: Mutt on May 02, 2016, 06:26:03 PM
Hi Tony73,



I'm sorry to hear that. That's a tough night, are things calmer today? It helps to talk.



Title: Re: Bpd.gf
Post by: Grey Kitty on May 02, 2016, 06:55:59 PM
Hello and welcome here!

That's indeed a crazy night. I've been in situations where I've been pushed farther than I've ever gone before too in this kind of crazy relationship.

The best thing you can do is make sure you get away from her, leaving the room or the house if you have to BEFORE things escalate that far. Do it when you start to feel attacked (verbally), not when you are attacked physically or fighting back.

Do you live with her, or do you have  separate house/apartment?


Title: Re: Bpd.gf
Post by: waverider on May 03, 2016, 01:33:40 AM
Hi Tony

it is difficult when you are caught out in the moment unprepared.

Take a moment to read through this previous discussion on these situations:

How to respond to heightened emotions (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=168004.msg11986938#msg11986938)

Waverider