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Title: Finally teared up Post by: Ahoy on May 03, 2016, 06:46:41 AM Yep, took 7 bloody weeks but it finally happened watching the movie road to perdition. The music at the end, made me ruminate about the loss of my 'ideal' her and the loss of our (my?) dreams/future with her.
I said goodbye (name) and lost it and DAMN it felt good. A weight has temporarily been lifted of my shoulders. Grief sure is a funny thing. I deal with the public a lot. I sure hope the next time it hits I'm still in a private place! Can't remember who said it on here, something like "let the pain wash through you" 100% right I think. Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: motleymoo on May 03, 2016, 07:03:38 AM Fellow Aussie here
I'm glad that you've felt comfortable enough to start feeling the emotions and accepting things as they are. Do you notice your old self starting to return? I've been where you are. I've felt the cloud lift, temporarily. It still comes back on occasion but at least I know that things are getting better. I'm not quite where you are yet... .I'm still reticent to get too close to certain activities (music especially triggers emotions quite strongly for me) but I know that allowing myself to actually feel the emotions rather than noticing them and backing away is the way to get through this. Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: Fogclearing on May 03, 2016, 07:08:33 AM I know it hurts but now the only way is up!
You seem to be a good man. You deserve the best in life. Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: once removed on May 03, 2016, 07:12:29 AM i assume its probably not as easy for you, but as an anonymous stranger thousands of miles away, it is easy for me to see the progress you are making Ahoy.
i know its hard; im glad it felt good. Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: Ahoy on May 03, 2016, 08:57:16 AM i assume its probably not as easy for you, but as an anonymous stranger thousands of miles away, it is easy for me to see the progress you are making Ahoy. i know its hard; im glad it felt good. Firstly, thanks everyone :) Secondly, I've been in a little rut this week, your comment made me take a step back and appreciate that at 7 weeks in I can see progress in myself from where I started. I'm going to indulge and take a little pride in that. What a nice way to end the day. Thanks again! Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: JerryRG on May 03, 2016, 09:59:21 AM Ahoy
|iiii Title: Re: Finally teared up Post by: bus boy on May 03, 2016, 10:38:46 AM Hi Ahoy. Glad your feeling better. At first it's a long hard road but it does get better. My ex BPD wife has been gone for a long time, I clung on to her for dear life. Her final discard came almost a year ago. It was hell for me but with her totally gone, I was able to start healing. So almost 1 year later I'm still tearing up, yesterday for that matter. I find it's less and less and every time I slip back, I'm twice as strong when I get my emotions back together. They bored into our soul and injected there poison. We are repairing severe emotional trauma, not a broken bicycle, it's going to take time. So let it flow, let it heal your pain. Success is the best revenge.
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