BPDFamily.com

I am seeking advice from those "in the know" about how the BPDx mind might work.  My sister is currently separating from her BPDh after a marriage of 20 years with 3 children between the ages of 9 to 16.  She finally had enough 12 months ago, and took a restraining order out on him and he was forced to leave their home. In the 12 months since then he has had very ad hoc contact with the kids, no overnights and has not contributed much financially, maybe bought the odd pair of shoes and paid for their drinks and movie tickets if he takes them out.  He has told my sister that she will get nothing from him.  He hasnt contributed anything to mortgage payments since leaving either.  My sister has started the formal process of getting Child Support roĺling and to forcibly garnish his wages, but here in Australia the process can take a loong time, especially when he is deliberately not receiving mail or taking phone calls. 

The level of assessed CS is not very much, as my sister earns quite a bit more than him, but given their mortgage and that she has sole care and financial responsibility for the children that little bit would help enormously in her weekly budgeting.

What I want to know is, is it better to delay the court proceedings for the division of assets and the custody of the children until he has felt the pain of responsibility in his pay packet and may therefore come to any negotiations with that in mind, or to get it all done and dusted as quickly as possible, so that as much as is possible the family can move on?  In Australia his non compliance in paying CS would be accounted for in the final division of assets,  but I dont know how much that may work out to be.  The maths in these cases must need a Doctorate in Mathmatics 8fiansl

I should add that in my opinion BPD dad is  low functioning and although he is still employed, his state of dysregulation is likely to get him sacked in the next 12 months.