BPDFamily.com

I am trying to learn how I can help my daughter without making the mistakes I have already made in not understanding BPD and misreading her symptoms as willfulness, teenage rebellion, and laziness.

Welcome Paulb888

I have a BPDs25 and it took us many years to dissect his behaviours. So many small pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, each when viewed on its own were not that noticeable or could be explained or justified, put all together a different view could be seen. It took us years and so much heartache and pain for my family. Diagnosis at 24 and the hard work now begins

There's a lot of information available on this site. Start using the tabs on the top right hand side of this page. There's topics, skills, reading, videos all to be seen or read.

As I better understood BPD and applied my knowledge to our particular situation things became clearer to me.  I was already aware that we were part of the problem, now I understand how we can all find a way to live despite the problems. Knowledge is power. We don't react in the way we used to. I validate and then validate again. I practise this skill and, together with this forum and my reading, we are seeing improvements in our family and wAy of life. There's ups and downs but onwards we go, we feel our way forward. We are becoming the parents our kids need. I demonstrate the behaviours I want to see, amazingly my BPDs reacts in s positive way. I have an orchid, not a dandelion, that needs to be nurtured. Who knew?

I look forward to reading your posts and learning more about your situation.  There's a wealth of experience here, no judgment and complete honesty. This forum has been a life saver.

I was overwhelmed at first but managed to refine it down to what I needed to focus on. Communication, validation skills and financial management. My adult BPDs does not seek treatment.

Good luck

Listening.

Validation.

Boundaries.

(This is almost S.E.T.!)